Especial Correspondents

sheriffjoeoinkMaricopa County Arizona $heriff Joe Arpaio is in big legal trouble and is asking supporters to help.

Arpaio said he doesn’t have the money for attorneys, adding that he feels “targeted” by the immigration rights groups that have sued him to stop what they say are racist policies targeting Latinos, according to the Los Angeles Times. [Mas…]

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menudokid(PNS reporting from ALTADENA) Javier “Flaco” Hernandez outraged his family Sunday night when he refused to eat his bowl of menudo.

“It’s yucky!” the 8-year-old shouted as he repeatedly banged his spoon on the dinner table and insisted on pizza instead.

Flaco’s refusal ticked off his mom, who had spent hours preparing the beef stomach broth in the kitchen of their tidy suburban Los Angeles County bungalow. [Mas…]

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yellowcar“Okay, podemos ir a caminar pero si te cansas, es tu problema. No cargo bebes,” Lina says meanly to her four-year-old cousin.

“I’m not a baby!” says Teresita predictably but then insists on bringing her large plastic car, a hideous yellow contraption with giant painted eyeballs instead of headlights. Teresita gets in the toy car and looks at Lina expectantly. Lina sighs and begins to push her down the street.

“This is just a stroller, you know.” Lina grumbles. “You’re not making any progress into becoming a real person.”

Teresita either does not hear or pretends not to understand the English sentence. Lina suspects that rather than being a child “confused by the dichotomies of her bilingual upbringing” as the pre-school teacher suggested, that Teresita is just selectively deaf. [Mas…]

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immigrationscaleChina and India now top Mexico as leading sources of new immigrants to the United Estates, new data reveals.

What are the Pocho Ocho top changes we can expect from these evolving patterns in immigration?

8. Indian actors will replace Puerto Ricans playing Mexicans on TV

7. San Jose, California will be known as Sanjay, California

6. White people will be considered “the model minority” [Mas…]

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ochodemayoOur Mexican friends have many misconceptions about today’s American celebration of El Ocho de Mayo. It is NOT the day the British burned the White House, for example, and it is NOT the day Gerry Rivers became Geraldo Rivera.

Help a hermano out with the Pocho Ocho Top Facts Mexicans Should Know about El Ocho de Mayo:

8. Best (Hellman’s in the East) Mayonnaise — El Jefe de Mayo — first introduced on this day in 1915.

7. Mayo West did not invent the life vest but she did flash her chichis to the sailors of the aircraft carrier USS Hooter on this day in 1942.

6. The Mayo Clinic — originally established to seek cures for La Cruda — opened its doors on this day in 1955. [Mas…]

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《低头人生》

Posted by 李金雄 on Sunday, April 19, 2015

The video is from China — the message is universal.


LiveLeak’s Jeffrey Barber has some serious warnings for you guys so listen up, K?

The pulsating you can see on this desk are YOYO NIOPION. These are extraterrestrial termites. They voraciously consumer not only wood, but everything. I mean EVERYTHING! but stone. They eat glass, steel, aluminum, plastic, wood, but most of all, they like, lithium. They thrive on lithium.

The two places that lithium is big in our reality are batteries, and in our brains. The YOYO NIOPION eat both of these things.

Scary, right? You don’t know the half of it! [Mas…]

billofrightsI
No law can say you can’t pray the way you want to, or make you pray if you don’t want to, or take your tax and give it to a guy who’ll use it to pray or preach on God, and no law can say you can’t say what you want to say, or print what you want to print, if you have a press; and no law can say that you can’t hang with your friends, or who you want to hang with, so long as you’re cool, and you can
ask The Man to give back your stuff if he took it, or fix what he broke, and that’s cool too.

II [Mas…]

Why advertising to Hispanics sucks balls* [Updated]

by BERNADETTE RIVERO April 6, 2015 Cultura
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Technically, the word I should have used above, in the headline, is “Manipulates.” As in, “Safely Manipulate Your Balls When You Celebrate!” That’s what the Federal Drug Administration advises this season, anyway. (Screen capture, above.) But I’m a writer who has spent a lifetime in both advertising and journalism, and I know the value of […]

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GOP presidential wannabe Saint Ted Cruz is on fire (photo)

by Especial Correspondents March 31, 2015 El Now
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Hail, Senator, full of crap. Special art thou among pendejos. Photo via imgur.

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Yo, New Yorkers! Don’t buy any gun, buy a ‘Gun With History’ (video)

by JOHN WILKES LEE HARVEY HUCKABEE March 19, 2015 Cultura
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There’s a new gun shop open in Manhattan where you don’t have to just settle for a newbie, inexperienced lethal weapon. The guns on sale here have a history!

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When you search DamnYouAutoCorrect for ‘Mexican’ (photos)

by Especial Correspondents March 11, 2015 Cultura
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Diamondbacks’ Pocho Ocho top dessert concepts before the Churro Dog

by Especial Correspondents March 6, 2015 Cultura
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Yes, they actually went there. Look for a new dessert this season at Chase Field in Phoenix as the National League Arizona Diamondbacks present the “Churro Dog.” Thankfully, no dogs were harmed in the making of this gut-busting, grand-standing heart-stopping dessert. WTF is a Churro Dog, exactly? ESPN has the story: The Churro Dog is […]

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Gay couple vs door-to-door missionary in ‘Knock Knock’ (video)

by AL YUNID February 27, 2015 Cultura
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Knock Knock. All the Christian missionary at the front door wants to know is if they have a few minutes to talk about “Our Lord and Savior.” Knock Knock.  But no one ever expects the lesbian inquisition. Video by German Torres. [NSFW language.]

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POCHO Poetry Corner: Chicano Love and Barrio Streets

by FRANK SOLIS February 27, 2015 El Now
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A rose grows among the cracked sidewalks, of the tear stained barrio streets, where happiness is a luxury and can easily be lost forever. While deep in their thoughts a young Chicano couple are falling in love. A painting of the Virgin looks down upon streets which are so far from heaven, yet not so […]

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Disneyland preps new WE ❤️ MEASLES marketing push

by PEDO MAUS February 23, 2015 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from ANAHEIM) Disneyland’s new WE ❤️ MEASLES marketing campaign intends to “pro-actively go where the customers are” by turning “lemons into lemonade,” PNS has learned.

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Pocho Ocho top reasons not to watch the Oscars

by Especial Correspondents February 20, 2015 Cultura
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Lot of pochos we know are insisting they won’t watch Sunday’s telecast of the Academy Awards. The big reason, of course, is Hollywood’s apparent inability to find roles for Latin@s other than maid or gangster (see infographic below). But that’s not all! Here are the Pocho Ocho Top reasons they’re boycotting the Oscars: 8. Reading […]

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Watch: Presidents Day? Thanks, Obama :-(

by Especial Correspondents February 16, 2015 Cultura
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Activists’ Pocho Ocho top pickup lines for Valentine’s Day

by Especial Correspondents February 13, 2015 Cultura
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Love is in the air for Valentine’s Day, along with cries for immigration reform, economic fairness and equal justice. Is there a way for the politically active pocha or pocho to get lucky AND make the world a better place? Yes, there is, in our list of the Pocho Ocho top activist pickup lines you […]

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Texas Senator Ted Cruz’ Pocho Ocho top legislative proposals

by Especial Correspondents February 12, 2015 El Now
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Senator Ted Cruz (R-Texas) has reintroduced legislation to take away federal benefits from same-sex married couples. But this troglodyte’s penedjitis is too advanced to stop at one stupid and hateful idea. That’s right, there’s more — Ted Cruz’s Pocho Ocho Top Legislative Priorities for 2015: 8. Federal guidelines on subsidized school lunches for poor children […]

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Black History Video: Gay pioneer Freddy ‘Fruit-Loop’ Jenkins (NSFW)

by GAYLORD P. HARNWELL February 11, 2015 Cultura
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Today’s Black History Month salute goes to Freddy “Fruit-Loop” Jenkins, the passionate trailblazer who broke out of the closet in the early 1900s as the country’s first openly-gay African-American man. Mohammed King reports. [NSFW adult language maybe.]

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A Day in the Life: Santa Apolonia taco truck, New Haven, CT (video)

by MOSCA MEXICAN February 2, 2015 Cultura
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La Vida Del Taco starts as the Santa Apolonia truck pulls up to its usual spot in New Haven, Connecticut and the work day begins. You can get tacos de lengua and cabeza here, not just pollo and carnitas. Watch as the truck is turned from a vehicle into an assembly line as the cooks […]

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What are America’s Pocho Ocho Top Brownest Jobs?

by Especial Correspondents January 27, 2015 Cultura
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The Atlantic analyzed the stats and guess what!? Some professions in the United Estates are positively teeming with white people — jobs like veterinarian, espeech sangwich pathologist and meelrye (chart excerpt, above). Hurm, we said, perhaps we can fabricate a similar list of America’s brownest jobs. “So let it be written, so let it be […]

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What are you doing? What am I doing? Be careful out there!

by Kat Avila January 23, 2015 Cultura
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“What are you doing?” I asked the teenage boy who was gleefully tagging a repainted space at Santiago Park in Santa Ana. Alarmed, he jumped down the small ledge to look up at the bridge where I was standing. Others emerged from beneath the bridge to see where the stranger’s voice was coming from. There […]

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