Especial Correspondents


The more you use the Internets, the more likely you are to lose your religion, according to a new study.

NPR explains:

America is less religious than ever before. The number of Americans who reported no religious affiliation has been growing rapidly, doubling since 1990. That kind of rapid change matches another societal trend — growth in Internet use. The percentage of Americans who say they used the Internet went from nearly zero in 1990 to 87 percent this year.

Now, a detailed data analysis finds the two trends aren’t just related, but that wider Internet use may actually be leading us to lose our religion. [Mas…]

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National Poetry Month means — to us — poems by and for the people, like Jesús Iñiguez with his poem about immigration. Spoiler alert — Iñiguez is not exactly happy with Administration policies and questions President Obama’s legacy. [NSFW "F-bomb."]

 

More from the Obama Legacy blog: [Mas…]

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univisiondebate(PNS reporting from EAST LOS) Texas State Senator Dan Patrick, a Republican Lieutenant Governor wannabe, was named Pendejo of the Month Wednesday by the American Pochismo Institute (API.) The award followed his Univision debate Tuesday with San Antonio Mayor Julián Castro (photo.)

API’s designation, which is usually not revealed until the end of the month, was awarded Wednesday to Patrick for actions “Above And Beyond the Call of Douchery” after Patrick sent this Tweet Tuesday evening about how much he loves “Hispanics:” [Mas…]

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(PNS reporting from RANCHO POCHO ESTATES) In a shocking file uploaded to the Internets last week, a mom in suburban Southern California has been captured on video feeding her baby hot salsa in a baby bottle in order to pay for her husband’s “picante burger” habit.

In the video, a spicy burger pusher known only as “Jack” — his true identity hidden by a grotesque disguise — rings the family’s doorbell and pretends to be religious missionary so the neighbors don’t suspect. “Do you have three minutes to talk about spicy hamburgers?” he asks burger-junkie Juan Desperado, who opens the door.

jackfrontdoor

“I have some something here I think you’ll like,” the pusher says. [Mas…]

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xptattoo(PNS reporting from EAST LOS) “It’s a sad day, ese,” said Ray “Code Boy” Santos, OG founder of area hacker clika MS2 (MS.DOS). “I saw the Windows XP Blue Screen of Death (BSOD) so often, he was mi hermano.”

“We used the XP version of Excel to tweak the hydraulics of Felipe’s ranfla. And I used to have weird dreams about the 3D pipes screensaver,” he told PNS Thursday. “All we had for music in those days was pinche Winamp, carnal, and we liked it!”

[Mas…]

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notorillasU.S. Latinos went to the movies in 2013 way more often than other ethnic groups, according to the Motion Picture Association of America. Latinos are 17% of the population but account for 32% of moviegoers who went to more than one movie a month.

Here are the Pocho Ocho reasons why Latinos are Hollywood’s best customers:

8. Air conditioning

7. You can sneak in your own meal

6. Fewer crying kids than at a birthday party [Mas…]

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We’re Number One! California leads nation in active hate groups

by Especial Correspondents April 4, 2014 El Now
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The Golden State leads in nation in the number of active hate groups, according to the Southern Poverty Law Center. California hosts 77 hate orgs, the report said.  Florida was second with 58 groups of haters, and Texas placed third with 57.

[Mas…]

Pope: ‘Quakes are message from God: Let there be gay’

by Especial Correspondents April 1, 2014 El Now
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(PNS reporting from VATICAN CITY) The recent earthquakes in Southern California are a message from God, according to Pope Francis. The Almighty, he told a visiting delegation of American Catholics Monday, will shake things up until they are more gay. “Lord knows this mortal world needs some bright flashes of color that aren’t suicide bomb […]

[Mas…]

Michoacán tornado home video: ‘¡No manches!’ (NSFW)

by ROD ESTERLING March 31, 2014 Doomsday Countdown
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A tornado hit the town of Tangancicuaro in the Mexican state of Michoacán on March 22, damaging over 250 homes. This unedited, single-take home video features great play-by-play voiceover while the camera documents flying chonies and other debris. And enjoy the narrator’s colorful vulgar interjections! [NSFW Spanish audio.]

[Mas…]

Pocho Ocho weird geographic chingaderas you probably never heard of

by Especial Correspondents March 19, 2014 El Now
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POCHO’s Comic Saenz wasn’t 100% sure where the Crimean Peninsula was on a map until last week, when Russia grabbed it, and he had no clue about the Strait of Malacca, where that Malaysian Airlines flight may have disappeared. He had to look this stuff up on the Internets (photo), and maybe you did too. That’s when […]

[Mas…]

Pocho Ocho items on Jan Brewer’s bucket list

by Especial Correspondents March 13, 2014 El Now
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Arizona Governor Jan Brewer won’t run again, she announced Wednesday, but said her retirement as governor won’t put an end to her dreams. “A mule is an animal with long funny ears,” she told an audience at a school in Glendale, AZ,  “she kicks up at anything she hears. Her back is brawny and her […]

[Mas…]

How to dance to Norteño wearing pointy boots, Stetson (video)

by Pocha Peña March 6, 2014 Cultura
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Botas picudas? Check! Cowboy hat? Check! Norteno music? Check! Let’s dance, but not too much. A minimalist dance. PREVIOUSLY ON BOTAS PICUDAS:

[Mas…]

How popcorn (hecho en Peru circa 4700 BCE) pops [video]

by MOSCA MEXICAN March 4, 2014 Cultura
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Popcorn — palomitas de maíz — was discovered-invented-perfected in Peru circa 4700 BCE, the very first domesticated corn product. Watch how the corn pops, up close and personal.

[Mas…]

Forget Los Oscars: Mira Los Hectors©! POCHO’s Annual Awards

by Especial Correspondents February 28, 2014 Cultura
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Behold, The Hectors©, bestowed for Excellence in Mockability. The Hectors© are named for POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz’ cousin Hector (photo), who is excellent at ruining family gatherings, especially when he has downed his third 12-pack. He hasn’t seen a film since Blood In, Blood Out. And the Hector© goes to:

[Mas…]

Chicanos: How did we become America’s new slave culture?

by Emiliano Villa February 26, 2014 Cultura
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Who are we? In my journey as a community activist and Chicano advocate, I’ve experienced many fascinating elements that have inspired me but also scarred me to my very soul. I have fought the Chicano politician who capitulated in the selling out of his community, broke bread with the “Old Man” whom lent the little […]

[Mas…]

Melania Benítez hasn’t cut her hair for 20 years (video)

by Especial Correspondents February 25, 2014 Cultura
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Melania Benítez hasn’t cut her hair for 20 years and now it’s eight feet long! Telemundo: La joven hace 20 años que no se lo corta porque dice que una vez que se lo cortó se arrepintió porque según dice no le quedaba bien y desde entonces optó por dejárselo crecer. PREVIOUSLY ON HAIR::

[Mas…]

Pocho Ocho top activist pickup lines for Valentine’s Day

by Especial Correspondents February 13, 2014 Cultura
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Love is in the air for Valentine’s Day, along with cries for immigration reform, economic fairness and equal justice. Is there a way for the politically active pocha or pocho to get lucky AND make the world a better place? Yes, there is! Check out our list of the Pocho Ocho top activist pickup lines […]

[Mas…]

Lowriting: Shots, Rides & Stories from the Chicano Soul [book review]

by XICANO007 February 12, 2014 Cultura
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Every once in awhile, a book comes out that inspires us to take a trip down memory lane. Such a book asks us to reflect on what was and will never be again. If we only knew then what we know now, things would be different we are fond of saying often as we look […]

[Mas…]