Dear Straight Dudes:
Why, hello there, I’m a Latina vagina and I have a message for heterosexual guys. Now I know what you’re going to ask me: “How well-groomed am I?”
No seas cochino! That’s none of your business, that’s personal. But I am here to, uh, talk business because I’m tired of all of these assumptions people make about me! [Mas…]
“Instant karma’s gonna get you,” John Lennon sang. This is true in both Brazil and San Bernardino County.
The Mexican Curling Team that will be going for gold at the Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang 2018 is training hard. Your modest cash contribution can help these brave young vatos as they go to SWEEP THE GOLD!
How did they get started with this less-than-mainstream sport? Consuela, of course: [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from ARIZONA) Racist Sheriff Joe Arpaio claims the Federal Government’s decision to reclaim “surplus” military gear (like tanks [photo] and M16 rifles) transferred to his department is no big deal since he has already procured new weapons to replace the full-auto rifles Uncle Sam wants back.
“Hell no! We don’t need tanks and M16s for these illegals,” the Maricopa County, Arizona lawman told reporters Wednesday. “We’re getting ethnically-appropriate personnel compliance effectuators from local manufacturers. I am told these things give Mexicans the FEAR!” [Mas…]
¡Feliz Hispanic Heritage Month! – Alcalde Eric Garcetti
Manhole cover image via Buzzfeed.
Hispanics across the United Estates are giddy with excitement as they prepare to observe Hispanic Heritage Month 2014, which starts Monday.
But with so much excitement, it’s easy to forget the fundamentals of this Federally-established fiesta.
¡Mira! A checklist! Here are the Pocho Ocho ways to prepare for Hispanic Heritage Month:
8. Reset your calendar so months begin on 15th
7. Purchase and enjoy all 57 bean varieties from Hispanic comida conglomerate Goya
6. Grow a luxurious mustache — you too, mujeres! [Mas…]
I stare at my third tumbler full of tequila,
looking at it like I did the other two,
with reverence at this golden,
aged a year or more in old whiskey barrels… [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from MASSACHUSETTS) A burrito is not a sandwich, you idiots, according to a court decision announced here last week.
Superior Court Judge Jeffrey Locke made the ruling as he threw out a lawsuit brought by a Panera restaurant seeking to stop White City Shopping Center in Shrewbsury from leasing space to a franchisee of the Qdoba Mexican Grill chain.
Panera’s lease prevents the center from renting space to a (competing) sandwich shop.
From the Associated Press:
[The judge] cited Webster’s Dictionary as well as testimony from a chef and a former high-ranking federal agriculture official in ruling that Qdoba’s burritos and other offerings are not sandwiches. [Mas…]