El Now

barackback

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thistallPresident Barack Obama will defy Republican haters tonight and reveal “executive actions” to “fix the broken immigration system.”

Our sources at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue have shared a copy of the 5 PM EST speech and we can now reveal the Pocho Ocho top immigration reforms you’ll hear in the President’s address to the Nation:

8. If Central American child refugees can pat their heads and rub their tummies at the same time, they can cut in line.

7. Families of DREAMers are OK to stay if they mow the lawn.

6. Badges, stinking or otherwise, no longer needed. [Mas…]

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tacogradientThe Unicode Consortium — the international group that sets tech specs so people around the world can use computers in any language — is considering the addition of new “emoji” next year, and one of them may be the computer code to display a taco.

The consortium published this illustration on their blog so everyone knows that’s what they taco about, the traditional Mexican dish composed of a corn or wheat tortilla folded or rolled around a filling.

The Atlantic reports:

This time next year, facing your phone’s keyboard and searching for just the right emoji, you may have some new characters at your disposal. [Mas…]

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grandoldbooty

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daveandbusterstweetThe Twitterverse exploded with charges of racism yesterday following pork-pushing restauranteurs Dave & Buster’s #TacoTuesday Tweet fail. (Photo of Tweet, since deleted from the company’s timeline.)

Even pimp-my-product professional journal AdWeek was pained by the chain’s gigantic boner:

And your massive brand Twitter fail of the day goes to … Dave & Buster’s! [Mas…]

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With the midterm election over, President Obama’s plan to use his executive powers to ease immigration issues for DREAMers, Central American refugees and others has Republicans up in arms about so-called “amnesty.”

Obama is “shredding the Constitution,” they claim, and even Mitt Romney, for Pete’s sake, has to remind Obama that he, Obama, is a loser. Jon Stewart and The Daily Show — with the help of Fox News — explain the big picture.

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garca43

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cucalatinovote

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UFO/OVNI buzzes nuclear power plant in Veracruz, Mexico (video)

by ZORRO MULDER November 18, 2014 El Now
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An Unidentified Flying Object/Objeto Volador No Identificado flew over a nuclear power plant in Veracruz, Mexico two weeks ago. It was not the first time. Why are they here? What do they want? Let’s ask the Inquistor:

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Mexico sets Diet Coke + Mentos mass eruption record (video)

by Barney Asada November 17, 2014 El Now
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Cheering throngs in the Mexican city of Leon, Guanajuato, set a new Guinness world record Saturday as 4,334 simultaneous “geysers” erupted, caused by combining Mentos breath mints with Diet Coke. The previous record was 2,865 diurnal emissions, set in the Philippines.

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Rosebud Sioux Nation: Keystone XL Pipeline Vote is ‘Act of War’

by Moctezuma Cortés November 17, 2014 El Now
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Last week’s vote to approve the controversial Keystone XL pipeline by the Republican-controlled United States House of Representatives constitutes an “act of war” and a “death warrant,” according to the South Dakota Rosebud Sioux (Lakota) Nation, Lakota Voice Rez News reported Friday. Tribal President Cyril L. Scott rebuked the House, according to Rez News: The […]

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La MIGRA uses drones to patrol 50% of the Mexico border (video)

by Lucida Grandé November 14, 2014 El Now
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Nearly half the US-Mexican border is now patrolled by Border Patrol Predator B2 drones, according to the Associated Press, and the government plans to expand the strategy to the Canadian border.

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La Cucaracha: NASA flies by a comet (#TBT 2010 toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz November 13, 2014 Cartoons
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NSFW Music Video: ‘Ya me canse (I’ve had enough)’

by Soy Capitan November 13, 2014 El Now
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“La democracia jamas puede aspirar a existir en una sociedad donde el gobierno no es igual al pueblo.” [Some images may disturb people who are afraid to look at what is going on in Mexico.] Video by Guy Montag. Music from Molotov: Dame El Poder.

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Mr. President: Tear down that wall! (toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz November 12, 2014 Cartoons
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After 45 minutes with no pulse, Boca mom returns (video)

by Verdana Bold November 12, 2014 El Now
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After an uneventful C-section, Boca Raton, Florida, mother Ruby Graupera-Cassimiro’s pulse stopped for 45 minutes. When her heart resumed beating on its own, Graupera-Cassimiro regained consciousness and shared her tale of what she found on “the other side.”

[Mas…]

Understanding Politics: The Natural Voting Cycle (toon)

by ERIC J. GARCIA November 12, 2014 Cartoons
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Pocho Ocho coolest addresses at new ‘.SOY’ Top Level Domain

by Especial Correspondents November 11, 2014 El Now
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Hey you Latinos – do you know your place in cyberspace? Forget .COM, .ORG, and .NET and move on up to the new .SOY Top Level Domain, “the place for Latinos online,” brought to you by domain registrar Google, Inc. (screencap above). What? The Goog explains: .SOY is the domain name for Latino identity and expression […]

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Neo-Nazis, KKK in Texas for swastika lighting and BBQ (NSFW video)

by Bronco del Camino November 10, 2014 El Now
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Members of the Texas Knights of the Ku Klux Klan and the Michigan-based National Socialist Movement (NSM) staged a “show of force” rally against undocumented immigrants Saturday outside the Rockwall County (Texas) Courthouse, according to RUPTLY: [NSFW adult language F-bomb audio.]

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His Royal Highness Prince Charles busts a move in Mexico (video)

by Barney Asada November 7, 2014 Cultura
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Heir to the British throne His Royal Highness Prince Charles joined a group of dancers Wednesday in the picturesque Mexican coastal town of Campeche. El Chaz danced the Sarao Campechano dance, twirling his handkerchief above his head. PREVIOUSLY ON BRITISH PRINCES:

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Watch: So you’re saying that really WASN’T a photo of ‘El Cucuy’?

by ROD ESTERLING November 7, 2014 Cultura
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Yo, calmate, guey! That “El Kookooee” photo from last week is really not El Cucuy, OK? It’s called “refraction,” gente. Get a grip. Albuquerque’s KRQE News explains:

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The 2014 midterm election results in one infographic

by Lalo Alcaraz November 6, 2014 Cartoons
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iJuan, smartphone app for day labor, scores $3,500,000 investment

by BUSINESS GWIRE PRESS RELEASE November 6, 2014 El Now
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(NOVEMBER 5, 2014, GUANAJUATO, MEXICO) iJuanCo, creator of iJuan, the first smartphone app to directly match day laborers and potential bosses, has secured a $3.5 million dollar investment from venture capital fund XS Dinero, iJuanCo company president Grito Del Toro announced here today. Day laborers using the app will be able to register their schedules, skill […]

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#TodosSomosAyotzinapa: We (43) are all Ayotzinapa (video)

by Andalé Mono November 6, 2014 El Now
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“Estamos indignados,” 43 different people say. “We are indignant!” Los nayaritas estamos indignados ante los sucesos de violencia y represión ocurridos en Ayotzinapa Guerrero.

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