(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON) While Republicans and FOX News have been quick to attack President Barack Obama’s anti-Ebola strategy, they didn’t hear this behind-the-scenes recording of the President’s remarks to health workers Wednesday. An un-named aide leaked this recording to POCHO this morning. [NSFW adult language.]
POCHO ÑEWS SERVICE PNS IS A WHOLLY-FICTITIOUS SUBSIDIARY OF POCHISMO INC., A CALIFORNIA CORPORATION, WHO IS A PERSON ACCORDING TO THE SUPREME COURT. DON’T ASK US, WE JUST WORK HERE.
(PNS reporting from SAN ANTONIO) Sandra Ceballos made a shocking discovery Friday night when she was out with her girlfriends.
The standards she’d been using to find a good husband were, as her friend Jenny put it, “appallingly low.”
Ceballos, whose family is from Mexico, was raised to believe that if a man is not too much of a drunk, works hard, and doesn’t beat you, he’s “good husband material.” [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from BROOKLYN) Hispanic Heritage Month is over, and without the corporate-approved celebration as a focus, local members of the Hispanic/Latino community here aren’t really sure how they can go on being local members of the local Hispanic/Latino community here.
“What now?” lamented Brooklyn native and prolific bloguera Marielena Gutierrez (photo, right.)
“Should I tell people to call me Mary Ellen for the remaining 11 months of the year? It’s not like they ever pronounce it right anyway,” she wrote on her PobrePickle blog. [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from CHICAGO) They think they’ve finally figured it out: A single gene — passed from father to son — is responsible for the hateful words and actions perpetrated by white males.
A 20-year-long Northwestern University study on male aggression, released this morning, backs their conclusion.
The report, Male Pattern Whiteness: Genesis or Genetics, details a genetic relationship between male whiteness and the wave of white-originated violence sweeping the country, like mass shootings, killer cops and senseless foreign wars. [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from FRESNO) The 16 Cal State Fresno MEChA students who flew to Hong Kong to join the student protest — but were quickly kicked out of the demonstration — returned home late Sunday night.
The students were ejected from Occupy Central after Hong Kong student organizers discovered that the Movimiento Estudiantil Chican@ de Aztlán backed the Chinese Communist government. As the only Reds participating in the protests, their calls for “revolution” differed significantly from the protestors’ demands. [Mas…]
It is a little known fact that 1970s supergroup ABBA became heroes to blonde Latinos throughout the Americas when the Spanish-language versions of the group’s singles Chiquitita, Fernando, Mama Mia and Dancing Queen failed to identify the band as Swedish. For years, Latin Americans treasured what they thought was the first Argentine band to hit it big.
To this day, older fans still wear their faded Se ABBA Español t-shirts and fair-haired fresas in Mexico City think that ABBA’s Frida Lyngstad painted surreal portraits of monkeys and Diego Rivera in her spare time. [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from HAVANA) Hey, kids! Now you can smell like dead Commies Che Guevara and/or Hugo Chavez with these two new scents from Cuba’s Labiofarm labs. (That’s “labio” not “labia,” you freaks.)
The just-announced perfume products could be a big source of hard currency for Venezuela‘s flagging economy, which Chavez poisoned and current Commandante Maduro is now kicking in the cojones.
The Hugo Chavez deal, insiders told PNS, was inspired by the Cuban regime’s multi-million-dollar revenue stream from the Che image licensing deal Comarade Fidel made with Nike (photo.) [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from ANAHEIM) Movie executives here are scrambling to respond to the fury over just-announced Christian religious figures re-imagined as Barbie dolls.
The Kens and Barbies are slated to promote the Mattel-Disney movie Crucifiction that “rebrands” the Passion of Jesus. The film is set for Xmas release.
The Disney reps — now on the defensive — have a heavy cross to bear. [Mas…]