Pocho Ñews Service

Daniel D. Portado: The 90s Are Back and So Am I! (video)

by Chuq El-Hed February 22, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from ALTA CALIFORNIA) The original militant self-deportationist Daniel D. Portado is back and proud as punch that his ex-boss Pete Wilson has endorsed GOP wannabe Mitt Romney. Romney has already advocated self-deportation, as Portado told Rachel Maddow, and that means Romney endorses Portado! “Attention mojados,” he warns in this video. “It’s time to [...]

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Video: The ‘Sheriff Babeu for @MexicanMitt’ TV spot

by Moss Kratloff February 20, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from ARIZONA) It’s the commercial the Mexican Mitt Romney campaign didn’t want you to see — an explosive TV endorsement by anti-immigrant Sheriff Paul Babeu calling for the erection of a GAYDAR border fence. The six-figure TV buy on local stations was cancelled over the weekend after Babeu faced hard questions about how [...]

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Mayan Doomsday experts can’t agree on how long is left

by Barney Asada February 18, 2012 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from the YUCATAN) The emergency Leap Year meeting of the Eschatological Chronology Society ended in disarray here Thursday as doomsday gurus couldn’t agree on whether the Mayan Apocalypse should be calculated in Colored People’s Time, Chicano Time or Jewish Standard Time. Scientists at the conference were hoping to resolve the question before Leap [...]

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Hate immigrants? Love homemade bombs? Come to Kansas!

by S.J. Rivera February 17, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from TOPEKA) Are you angry? Is your ugly truck plastered with bigoted stickers? Do you have homemade explosives at home and in your vehicle? Are you a  veteran who hates immigrants and anyone who “no-speako-the-English?” No problemo, amigo! Come to Topeka, KS where you can park your truck full of homemade explosives next [...]

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Mexico issues travel warning for Los United Estates

by S.J. Rivera February 15, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) In the widest travel advisory since the Zoot Suit Riots of the 1940s, the Mexican government is recommending that Mexicans avoid travel to all or parts of the United States of America. Mexico’s State Department has warned against any nonessential travel in all of California, Arizona, Texas and New Mexico [...]

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Around Our Town: News from your neighbors

by CHALE KNICKERBOCKER, SOCIETY EDITOR February 15, 2012 Cultura
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WEDDING: Mr. and Mrs. Julio Santiago of Pocho Estates are pleased to announce the marriage of their daughter Suzanne to Samson Lei of Monterey Park, son of Mrs. Chin Louie of San Francisco and Mr. Stagger Lei of New Orleans.  After a honeymoon in Hawaii, the couple will be moving far away from both sets [...]

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Grammys face major boycott by Mexican musicians ‘Los 60%’

by Victor Payan February 12, 2012 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from LOS GRAMMYS) Still reeling from the announcement that A-list musicians like Weird Al Yankovic are boycotting tonight’s Grammy Awards due to the elimination of 31 ethnic music categories, the music cartel is now being hit by a second major protest, this one launched by Mexico’s top recording stars. The musicians, organizing themselves [...]

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Vicente Fernandez to open Las Vegas mariachi-themed casino

by Victor Payan, Business Charrospondent February 10, 2012 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from LAS VEGAS) Soon-to-retire Mexican recording legend Vicente Fernandez is opening a mariachi-themed casino in Las Vegas. Designed to cash in on the immense popularity of such large-scale theme casinos as “New York, New York,” Fernandez said he expects to open his casino “Guadalajara, Guadalajara” by the end of the year. The casino, which [...]

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Superstar Vicente Fernandez announces rey-tirement

by Victor Payan February 10, 2012 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) Mexican superstar Vicente Fernandez, El Rey de la Cancion Mexicana, announced his retirement from the music industry Thursday, culminating a career that spanned more than 90 years, nearly 100 offspring and more gold records than a conquistador’s wet dream. Known to his adoring fans as Chente, Don Chente, Señor Chente, [...]

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@MexicanMitt TV ad: ‘The Most Mexican Man In The World’

by Chale Knickerbocker February 9, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from an undisclosed Goat Ranch in Chihuahua) Mexican Mitt Romney’s headquarters here today released their first television commercial, a tribute to the “most Mexican man in the world.” This ad shows why @MexicanMitt is the leader of the Juan Percent. He doesn’t always make TV commercials, but when he does, they’re pinche funny. Stay [...]

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