It’s coming — the End of the World As We Know it is just three weeks away — December 21 [CHECK OUR EXCLUSIVE MAYAN APOCALYPSE DOOMSDAY 2012 COUNTDOWN TIMER IN THE RIGHT COLUMN AND SYNCHRONIZE YOUR DEVICES.]
From the video:
The sun has been totally erupting with massive solar flares, dude, because the Earth and Jupiter are no longer in alignment, causing the Sun to fall inward on itself because there is less gravity pulling the Sun out, dig? Have you formulated emergency plans? It will be interesting to see what happens in the next 24 hours!
In China, Lu Zhenghai has been reading up on the upcoming Mayan Apocalypse Doomsday and he is totally prepared with his bitchin’ new self-constructed ark.
Britain’s Daily Mail reports:
The vessel, which has cost him ¥1million (£100,000), measures 21.2m long, 15.5m wide, 5.6m high and displaces about 140 tons of water.
Lu, from Urumqi, Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region, admits it’s not much to look at, but is confident it will serve its purpose.
With Mayan Apocalypse Doomsday 2012 so close, time is running out to assemble the emergency survival supplies you’ll need in your underground shelter.
Unforeseen dangers and unknown entities will be lurking in your No-Tech Future Hell on Earth (think Mad Max meets the chupacabra), what you have with you will determine whether you live or die.
Aside from rice, beans, water, sanitary supplies and beer (which will also be the means of exchange, i.e., money), these are the pocho ocho top items you need:
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8. Aqua Net
6. Switchblade (for him)
5. Chanclas (for her)
4. La Virgen candles
3. Sriracha sauce (don’t judge)
2. RATM t-shirts (him and her.) Chupacabras hate RATM.
And the numero uno thing you’ll need in your Mayan Apocalypse Doomsday 20012 survival kit is…
An accordian — art, entertainment and a long-range low-tech high-impact weapon all in one!