Pocho Ocho key provisions of Republican ‘Dream Act Lite’

by Especial Correspondents on November 27, 2012 in El Now, Pocho Ocho

They got a serious ass-whupping and they know it, so Republican “moderates” are crafting a “Dream Act Lite” to try to bridge the gap with Latinos.

Here are their Pocho Ocho key provisions:

8. Replace old slogan “No wet backs, no wet dreams” with something more encouraging.
7. Military service need not be completed to achieve citizenship if you are killed in line of duty.
6. You dropped some “anchor babies”? Can you sing “In the Navy”? We thought you could.
5. Reech, beech? Go to the head of the line.
4. You’re white, right? Ditto.
3. On approved credit; not all applicants will qualify.
2. Offer may not be valid in certain Blue States; check secession status for details.

And the numero uno key provision in the Republican Dream Act Lite is…

No students who are studying ethnic studies allowed.

Elise Roedenbeck contributed to this report.

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