black magic woman

Carlos Santana mends his evil ways, lists Las Vegas house for sale

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(PNS reporting from LAS VEGAS) Guitar hero and chart-topping band leader Carlos Santana has put his 7,240-square-foot, four-bedroom, six-bath home up for sale as part a 12-step program to “mend…[his]..evil ways” and simplify his life, PNS has learned.

“When I come home, Baby, my house is dark and my pots are cold,” he told area Realtor® Babette “Call Me Baby” DiFranco when he gave her the Skybird Court listing. The home is offered at $3,499,900.

The amazing state-of-the-art luxury home with million-dollar Strip, golf, city and mountain views is located on an oversized lot in Redhawk at The Ridges and allows one to relax in the spacious master retreat with a fireplace and large balcony with stunning views. And that’s where the guitarist’s problems began, according to DiFranco.

“House put a spell on me, Baby, turnin’ my heart into stone,” Santana told the real estate agent. “It’s like I need you so bad, but I can’t leave you alone.”

Mas…Carlos Santana mends his evil ways, lists Las Vegas house for sale

Ñewsweek: LOST GOV Jan Brewja, boobs, San Diego billboard

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When Jan Brewja, governor of the Hate State of Arizona (photo,right), officially announced her absence from the jurisdiction, concerned Americans began a desperate search for LOST GOV, posting flyers on telephone polls and all over the Internets.

Her mysterious disappearance almost overshadowed the shocking revelation of Iowa’s Brian Peterson, who finally had to come to grips with the fact that he watches telenovelas for the boobs, not to learn Spanish like he originally told himself.

And in San Diego, a multimillionaire commissioned a billboard to get himself a new girlfriend for Christmas — a “Christmas Latina.” Our Especial Correspondents uncovered some earlier versions of the billboard, and an intrepid photographer snapped the final version of the message.

Here are the links to the top stories that broke the ñews:

Mas…Ñewsweek: LOST GOV Jan Brewja, boobs, San Diego billboard