election

Mitt Romney: I’m proud to announce my new bank, JP Mormon

by GOV. WILLARD MITT ROMNEY May 16, 2012 El Now
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Barack Hussein Obama’s biggest donors and best crony capitalist friends at JP Morgan Chase recently lost over two billion dollars in risky trades. Instead of wailing about this so-called “Wall Street reform” nonsense, I have decided to open my own bank and mega Wall Street trading firm: JP Mormon. At JP Mormon, we promise to [...]

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Mexican Mitt Romney: Obama is spiking the gay football

by MEXICAN MITT ROMNEY May 10, 2012 El Now
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AJUA!! I am Mexican Mitt Romney, and I am here to clear the record on the GAY MARRIAGE. Contrary to reports by ABC News and Perez Hilton about Barack Obama being the first president to approve of same-sex marriage, I invented it, and now Barack Obama is hogging all the credit! If you ask me, [...]

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Where is the youth enthusiasm for Obama 2012? (Daily Show video)

by Andalé Mono May 8, 2012 El Now
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These darn kids today with their hoodies and Google Goggles and personal jetpacks — are they as excited about this year’s presidential election as they were in 2008? The Daily Show’s Senior Latino Correspondent Al Madrigal went to Virginia Commonwealth University to investigate.

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Romney campaign tries to shake off Etch A Sketch remark

by Lalo Alcaraz March 23, 2012 Cartoons
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The Romney campaign is one built on strong policy principles, unless, of course, they need to change them to pander to primary voters. “Well, I think you hit a reset button for the fall campaign. Everything changes,” Romney campaign advisor Eric Fehrnstrom said Wednesday on CNN. “It’s almost like an Etch A Sketch. You can [...]

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Rick Santorum’s Pocho Ocho political proposals

by Comic Saenz March 15, 2012 El Now
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Although many are shocked by presidential pretender Rick Santorum’s proposal to consider statehood for Puerto Rico if it drops Spanish and espeaks English, it turns out this idea is only the newest of his Brainfarts Brainstorms for America. Here are the Pocho Ocho: 8. Mexico’s Los Tigres del Norte will be offered citizenship if they lose [...]

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Mexican Mitt has eye on enchilada for Super Taco Tuesday

by Lalo Alcaraz March 6, 2012 El Now
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With more than a dozen states and 437 delegates in play, Super Tuesday is the biggest contest of the GOP primaries since Newt Gingrich challenged Mexican Mitt Romney to a wife-off. Mexican Mitt Romney vows to sweep today’s Super Taco Tuesday Republican presidential contest. “I will win not only the whole enchilada, but the additional taco, the [...]

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Ñewsweek: Hectors and actors and commentators oh my

by Comic Saenz March 4, 2012 El Now
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POCHO’s ñews team started the week in glossy Hollyweird and ended up scraping the crap off their shoes near Rush Limbaugh’s headquarters in La Floridita, but the big story of the week was the release of Mexican Mitt Romney’s music video/camapaign commercial. Will the GOP wannabe  become the nation’s first Latino president? And why does [...]

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Satan speaks: Santorum, the election and Mayan Doomsday

by S.J. Rivera February 23, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from HELL) GOP Presidential candidate Rick Santorum is making no attempt to distance himself from his inflammatory 2008 remarks accusing Satan of “attacking America” but Satan responded Wednesday,  claiming that Santorum is in for a “big surprise.” Pocho Ñews Service sent especial correspondent S. J. Rivera  deep into Hades to interview the Prince of [...]

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Daniel D. Portado: The 90s Are Back and So Am I! (video)

by Chuq El-Hed February 22, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from ALTA CALIFORNIA) The original militant self-deportationist Daniel D. Portado is back and proud as punch that his ex-boss Pete Wilson has endorsed GOP wannabe Mitt Rammane. Romney has already advocated self-deportation, as Portado told Rachel Maddow, and that means Romney endorses Portado! “Attention mojados,” he warns in this video. “It’s time to [...]

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Al Madrigal tells Jon Stewart all about the ‘Latino Vote’

by Comic Saenz February 21, 2012 El Now
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POCHO Migrant Editor and Daily Show Senior Latino Correspondent Al Madrigal explains the nuances of the Latino electorate to host Jon Stewart. The secret? Arroz by any other name …

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