(PNS reporting from MEXICO) Mexican researchers are baffled by the discovery of a lost tribe of Frenchmen living in an artfully-decorated cave in the foothills of Mt. Popocatépetl in the state of Puebla.
The Frenchmen, found by a group of hikers, are believed to be descended from a military patrol that went missing in 1862, during the French occupation of Mexico.
The cave was discovered when the hikers followed the distinct smell of espresso to its entrance. Upon entering, they found the walls painted with scenes of picnics and absinthe drinkers and the floors littered with empty bottles of the hallucinatory liqueur.
Through the process of cabron-dating, which involves reading the label on the bottle, it was confirmed the absinthe was from the Napoleonic Era. [Mas…]
Self-consciously cool French dudes sure love their iPads, but sometimes, as the mademoiselles know, one must squeeze Le Charmin, or Le Trefle, as they say in France. D’accord, Monsieur Whipple? Or do we have to mansplain it to you?
Since we’ve established that Americans and Canuckians eat burritos in outer espace, we asked our French astronaut friends what was cooking. “It’s a small plate for a man,” they replied. “Blanquette de veau.” [Video by Corentin Charron.]
(PNS reporting from NEW ENGLAND) New Hampshire is the small Yanqui state where Republicans vote today in a primary election. When tonight’s results come in, remember where they’re coming from – a jurisdiction where people live a lie, talk in a dialect devoid in rhoticity and don’t go to church like other Americans!