If the Republican Party, formerly the “Party of Lincoln,” is to succeed nationally, it needs more women, “minorities,” and younger voters. Old angry reactionary white people is not a growing constituency.
Here are Pocho Ocho ways the GOP can bring more young voters aboard:
The Daily Show’sSenior Latino Correspondent Al Madrigal explains to Jon Stewart the tough but fair conditions Latinos will impose on Republicans hoping to one day win back the White House. [Disclosure: Al Madrigal is also POCHO's Migrant Editor.]
(PNS reporting from NEW YERSEY) Literally hours after Dominican immigrant Pedro Quezada won the $338 million New Jersey Powerball jackpot Saturday, the Republican Party announced that the years 2013-2023 will be known as the Decade of the Dominican.
The news was met with universal cynicism, and is seen as the latest in a series of floundering attempts by the party to attract new minority members to its ranks.
“We are really thrilled for Mr. Quezada, as this is the first time in years a Dominican in New Jersey has raised his hands over his head without being surrounded by police,” said African-American GOP spokesman Sam Beau.
“Plus, the fact that he is named ‘Pedro’ makes it easier for us to remember his name.” [Mas…]
Dear Party of Lincoln:
I am very interested in the Latino Wrangler opening at the Republican National Committee you advertised on CraigsList.
My wife is half Mexican, my son is one-quarter Mexican and I have been to Mexico four times for cheap lobster, not that anyone's ethnicity would be used as a qualification for this job. I'm white, of course. [Mas…]
The Colbert ReportGet More: Colbert Report Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,Video Archive It’s not going to be easy for Gov. Mitt Romney to win Latino votes, but Esteban Colberto lays out the possible approaches
(PNS reporting from NEW YORK CITY) Lady Gaga — on tour to promote a new album — is showing off new red hot wardrobe performance pyrotechnics designed to appeal to Latinos. The chanteuse commissioned a special exploding salsa bra (see artist’s rendering) and will personally dispense salsa into the tacos of Latinos across the country. [...]
RNCLatinos.com, the Republican National Committee’s new Latino outreach website, is apparently a laboratory for developing new ways of screwing up Latino outreach. Last week RNCLatinos hosted a Spanish-language poll asking “Has President Obama disillusioned you?” (the overwhelming response was “No”) and then they used a stock photo of Asian children at the top of their page. [...]
Pop quiz: Say you’re the mayor of East Haven, CT and you wouldn’t know the meaning of STFU even if someone dropped a dumpster-full of it on your head from 90 stories up. A TV reporter asks for comment after the FBI busted four of your police officers on charges they acted like “bullies with [...]