From the party who brought you
REPUBLICAN LETTER TO IRAN!
No shit. We grabbed all the text and images from your House Judiciary Committee’s website as soon as we saw it so we could present it to you in all its animated GIF-y wonder. We made it better, though, since the GOP geeks apparently don’t know how to resize GIFS, even though they’re all GIFs of white people! And they do not — I REPEAT DO NOT — like President Obama’s executive actions on immigration.
This webpage is called “AT THE FLICK OF A SWITCH”
Mar 18 2015
1. Right now, one single person – the President of the United States – can turn off the enforcement of our immigration laws unilaterally. For real.
[Toon mashed up from the Internets. Original source unknown.]
Senator Ted Cruz (R-Texas) has reintroduced legislation to take away federal benefits from same-sex married couples. But this troglodyte’s penedjitis is too advanced to stop at one stupid and hateful idea.
That’s right, there’s more — Ted Cruz’s Pocho Ocho Top Legislative Priorities for 2015:
8. Federal guidelines on subsidized school lunches for poor children shall encourage incorporation of nutritious roadkill meat, especially racoon. Now yer ‘coon is a touch on the greasy side, not sweet like ‘possum, but if you cook ‘em up right, mmmmmmm, racoon!
7. Women banned from buying condoms because it curtails a Man’s Right to Reproduce.
6. Solar energy outlawed because it sucks the light right out of the Sun. [Mas…]
Citing the burden of compliance with “big government,” Senator Thom Tills (R-North Carolina) (photo) would let restaurants “opt out” of regulations requiring employees to wash their hands before returning to work.
This isn’t the only rule Tills would eliminate, and he isn’t the only Republican with this opinion. These are the Pocho Ocho top rules the GOP thinks we should ignore:
8. I before E, except after C
7. Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself
6. Mind the gap [Mas…]