romney

Opinion: We must fight the anti-Mayan Calendar Illuminati 1% (video)

by JUNIOR WENCES Ph.D. May 14, 2012 Doomsday Countdown
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We might not know anything about them, but Anonymous knows almost everything about us, including stuff THE MAN doesn’t want YOU to know. The modishly-masked online crusaders will soon shock our chakras with the truth about apocalyptic confluences predicted by the Mayan Calendar and aether-entities from outer espace. Predictably, the Mainstream Media New World Order [...]

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Fired undocumented gardener sorry he ‘peed on Romney’s petunias’

by JERRY RIVERS May 11, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from BEVERLY HILLS) Inspired by Mitt Romney’s apology for assaulting a long-haired commie prep school classmate, one of the undocumented gardeners Romney hired and then fired in 1996 has issued his own apology. Berto Lopez, now working as a freelance arborist in Beverly Hills, regrets he once peed on the then-governor’s prized petunias. “I [...]

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Ñewsweek: MEChA makeover, French tribe in Puebla, MX, Hey Vato!

by Comic Saenz May 6, 2012 El Now
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It’s so last century, the new generation of Chicano students say, and the hard-to-pronounce-and-explain name for venerable activist organization M.E.Ch.A has to change! POCHO covered the explosive debate and published your reader comments in this week’s biggest story. And history came alive as anthropologists discovered a previously-lost tribe of Frenchman living in caves near the [...]

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Adios, Gordo Gingrich! You’ll never get your sangwich :(

by MOL DEF May 2, 2012 El Now
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Former Freaker of the House Newt Gingrich’s campaign for the Republican presidential nomination is over. POCHO laments the loss of this serial adulterer and nominee wannabe, as his ignorant, racist douchebaggery provided us with lots of ñews, including this Spanish-language campaign commercial with realistic English subtitles. And there’s more below:

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Romney courts ‘Hispanic vote’ with cartoon parrot sidekick (video)

by Comic Saenz May 1, 2012 El Now
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GOP presidential wannabee Mitt Romney knows he needs help with the “Hispanic vote” so he hired a Spanish-speaking, taco-loving parrot named Paco to help him out on the campaign trail. This is their first joint video. Contrast and compare with Romney’s earlier Nosotros ad, presented here with English subtitles.

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Pocho Ocho ways the candidates are scheming to get the Latino vote

by Elise Roedenbeck and S.J. Rivera April 20, 2012 El Now
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8. Gastronamía Going after the gastronomic vote, Dems and Repubs plan to offer Latino voters free tacos and salsa at the polls (all tacos made by immigrant labor.) Mitt Romney has even changed his tune about cheesy grits, now heralding cold maduros as his favorite breakfast. 7. Stereotypical Shows Both parties are promising to fund [...]

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Ñewsweek: Tucson school board’s exercise in ignorance and hate

by MIGUEL GUALES April 8, 2012 El Now
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POCHO Migrant Editor Al Madrigal (he commutes coast-to-coast so he can work nights as Senior Latino Correspondent for The Daily Show) went to Tucson AZ to find out why students there aren’t allowed to take classes in Mexican-American history. Cameras running, Al interviewed a school board official who was apparently high on ignorance, stupidity and hate. [...]

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Pocho Ocho ways Republicans celebrate International Women’s Day

by Victor Payan March 8, 2012 Cartoons
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8. Republican Party is trying to get IUDs reclassified as WMDs 7. Rick Perry is blasting Susan G. Komen for the Cure for “not being man enough” when caving in during Planned Parenthood flap 6. Rush Limbaugh plans to lose more sponsors over “slut” remark

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Pocho Ocho best campaign songs for Mexican Mitt Romney

by Victor Payan March 8, 2012 El Now
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Since Mexican Mitt’s nomination is inevitable after his domination on Super Taco Tuesday, we graciously offer our list of the Pocho Ocho campaign songs that would rock his 2012 campaign – Mittchoacan style. 8. Lowrider 7. Stayin’ Alive 6. Volver Volver

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Daniel D. Portado invites you to Hispanics for Romney AZ rally

by Xapi Trailes February 28, 2012 El Now
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(PNS reporting from ARIZONA) GOP wannabe Mitt Romney’s Hispanic outreach coordinator Daniel D. Portado, the militant self-deportationist, wants you to stop by the big campaign rally today after you vote for Mitt. Meet your favorite Latino-loving politicians like Gov. Jan Brewer, Sheriff Joe Arpaio and Sheriff Paul Babeu.

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