spanish

Me llaman el Sr. Chang y yo seré su profesor de español en este semestre.

{ 1 comment }

common-asian-chino(PNS reporting from NORMAL, ILL) Demographers at Pocho Asian American Policy Institute (PAAPI) here have just released a new map detailing the most common Asian languages spoken in the U.S., broken out on a state by state basis, in English and Spanish. [Click on image to enlarge.] [Mas…]



Mystery of the ages! You won’t believe what this actress and flamenco guitarist said! The one weird phrase that turned a Spanish ingenue into a superstar! I never expected I’d react like this when watching a video from Oprah! When this blonde chica began playing, the audience gasped!

Charo fans: You know you’ve been waiting for this. Was it worth the wait?

The Huffington Post reports: [Mas…]

otherthanenglish
Slate’s infographic mapping magic illustrates what we knew already — across most of the United Estates, Spanish is almost always the most commonly-spoken language besides English.

But after English and Spanish, what’s Numero Tres? Here in California, it’s Tagalog, first language of a quarter of all Filipinos and the second language of most. Pinoys, ruled by both Spain and the U.S., are the honorary (?) Latinos of Asia.

Tagalog? If you’ve got cooties, or play with a yo-yo, or live in the boondocks, you’re speaking Tagalog.

There are also unexpected results in Texas and Florida and New York and Illinois and…. Here’s the spoken language third place map: [Mas…]

ESPANOL: La India María debe encontrar a toda costa en lo recóndito de una montaña, El Mágico Espejo Negro de Tezcatlipoca, pues el espíritu de su bisabuelo Moctezuma Xocoyotzin así lo ha ordenado para evitar la destrucción de México.

Alonso, un atractivo arqueólogo español, Bianchi, un tramposo busca-tesoros y Brígida Troncoso — una ambiciosa gobernadora, se enteran de la existencia del dichoso Espejo, del misterioso Tesoro de Moctezuma y de la tal María, por lo que todos emprenden una frenética persecución detrás de ella para apoderarse del cristal mágico y del oro.

  ENGLISH: La India María (born María Nicolasa Cruz) must find, at all costs, hidden away in a big mountain, The Magic Black Mirror of Tezcatlipoca. She’s on a mission ordered by the spirit of her great grandfather Moctezuma Xocoyotzin,and she must succeed to stop the destruction of all Mexico.

Alonso, an attractive Spanish architect, Bianchi, a crazy treasure hunter and Brígida Troncoso, an ambitious governor, all find out about the existence of the Mirror, the mysterious Treasure of Moctezuma and María, which is why everyone pursues her to try to take away the magical crystal and gold.


Enjoy the Internacional, the world-wide (Get it? It’s international!) anthem of those red commie cabrones in Cuba and Venezuela and China and North Korea (and lurking in secretive cells everywhere else but the lame stream media sheeple won’t tell you that.)

May 1 is May Day AKA International Workers’ Day. Today the communist comrades sing this stirring appeal, with its hummable melody and a vague vision of a better future that’s hard to disagree with, except maybe the LUCHA FINAL aspect.

Yet even as they sing this Kommie Kumbaya, the Marxist minions are locking millions up arbitrarily, invading foreign countries, spying on their fellow citizens and — we’ve read reports — killing innocent civilians by remote control. Oh, wait.

THE INTERNATIONALE LYRICS IN ENGLISH AND SPANISH: [Mas…]

(PNS reporting from RANCHO POCHO ESTATES) In a shocking file uploaded to the Internets last week, a mom in suburban Southern California has been captured on video feeding her baby hot salsa in a baby bottle in order to pay for her husband’s “picante burger” habit.

In the video, a spicy burger pusher known only as “Jack” — his true identity hidden by a grotesque disguise — rings the family’s doorbell and pretends to be religious missionary so the neighbors don’t suspect. “Do you have three minutes to talk about spicy hamburgers?” he asks burger-junkie Juan Desperado, who opens the door.

jackfrontdoor

“I have some something here I think you’ll like,” the pusher says. [Mas…]


That awkward moment when you turn into an elephant. I hate when that happens! [Spanish with English captions.]

Los Beatles: ‘And I Love Her’ (Cantada al Español) [video]

by MOON GUAC February 9, 2014 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Los Beatles: ‘And I Love Her’ (Cantada al Español) [video]

Fifty years ago tonight, pop music was reborn when four lads from Liverpool astounded America with their debut performance on the Ed Sullivan Show. They write their own songs, you say? They play their own instruments? They sing, too? In the era of Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello and manufactured “teen entertainment,” the Beatles were […]

[Mas…]

Did I ever tell you that I’m half Mexican? (Vine video)

by EDUARDO BURRO February 6, 2014 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Did I ever tell you that I’m half Mexican? (Vine video)

Brandon Calvillo tells his friend David Lopez that he, Brandon, is half Mexican. Lopez, it seems, is not all that pumped. [Remember, with these Vine videos, you need to hover and click on the top left corner of the graphic to hear the audio.] PREVIOUSLY ON VINE VIDEOS:

[Mas…]

‘America the Beautiful’ in Spanish pisses off the haters (videos)

by MOON GUAC February 3, 2014 Cultura
Thumbnail image for ‘America the Beautiful’ in Spanish pisses off the haters (videos)

Sunday’s Coca Cola’s Super Bowl commercial spotlighting America the Beautiful (sung in the languages of immigrants who built and continue to build our country) predictably pissed off the Internet haters who have been waiting to dis little patriotic kids since Sebastien de la Cruz sang The Star-Spangled Banner at last year’s NBA finals. Didn’t see […]

[Mas…]

Pete Seeger, audience sing ‘Guantanamera’ in Spanish (video)

by Comic Saenz January 28, 2014 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Pete Seeger, audience sing ‘Guantanamera’ in Spanish (video)

The late Pete Seeger always got everyone in the audience to sing along for Guantanamera — in Spanish. (Editor’s Note: That’s why they call it folk music. It’s music you sing, not just music you hear.) Wikipedia: Seeger ['s] intention [was] that [Guantanamera] be used by the peace movement at the time of the Cuban […]

[Mas…]

Survey says? Pocho Ocho top Chipster New Year’s Resolutions

by Especial Correspondents January 15, 2014 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Survey says? Pocho Ocho top Chipster New Year’s Resolutions

To be a Chipster (Chicano + Hipster) is not a destination, but a journey, and seekers must never rest. These are the Pocho Ocho Chipster New Year’s Resolutions our readers shared with us: 8. Despite the Indio heritage that gives me a sparse Fu Manchu facial hair configuration, I resolve to grow a Chente-strength bigote […]

[Mas…]

¡Wachale! POCHO Public Service New Year 2014 Punctuation Alert

by María Purísima December 28, 2013 Cartoons
Thumbnail image for ¡Wachale! POCHO Public Service New Year 2014 Punctuation Alert

The tilde — don’t leave home without it! Please share! PREVIOUSLY ON HOLIDAY CULTURE ALERTS:

[Mas…]

A message on ‘El Contestador (The Answering Machine)’ (NSFW video)

by Barney Asada December 26, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for A message on ‘El Contestador (The Answering Machine)’ (NSFW video)

WTF? It’s an old answering machine — a gift from Mom — with a disturbing voicemail message from Abuelita. What to do? [NSFW adult language en Espanish.]

[Mas…]

Construction Zone: Must wear hard hat and mustache (photo)

by EresNerd December 19, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Construction Zone: Must wear hard hat and mustache (photo)

¡Peligro! ¡Bigote! From two years ago, photographer and location unknown, found on Imgur PREVIOUSLY ON BIGOTE/MUSTACHE:

[Mas…]

Mami, it’s cold outside (video)

by HELLA HIELO December 18, 2013 El Now
Thumbnail image for Mami, it’s cold outside (video)

Post by DigiBunch. That awkward moment when your boogers freeze and you miss the nice warm playa back in the DR. ¡Mami!

[Mas…]

Public Service Announcement: No such thing as a ‘tamale’ (video)

by MOSCA MEXICAN December 13, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Public Service Announcement: No such thing as a ‘tamale’ (video)

As POCHO Subcommandanta del Ñews Sara Inés Calderón (she’s @SaraChicaD on the Twitter) noted the other day, there is no such thing as a “tamale.” There is one TAMAL and and there are plural TAMALES. Thanks in advance for your cooperation in getting this distinction across. PREVIOUSLY ON TAMALES:

[Mas…]

Bad Accent Video Theatre: ‘El Amor de Mi Amante’ (My Lover’s Love)

by EresNerd December 5, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Bad Accent Video Theatre: ‘El Amor de Mi Amante’ (My Lover’s Love)

Student film? Bad Accent Video Theatre? Whatever! El Amor de Mi Amante is mini-telenovela brought to you by Taco Bell and this year’s hottest new fragrance – Twist! PREVIOUSLY ON BAD SPANISH ACCENT VIDEO THEATRE:

[Mas…]

New! From Univision: ‘Los Walking Dead’ (telenovela video)

by Moctezuma Cortés November 15, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for New! From Univision: ‘Los Walking Dead’ (telenovela video)

When Hell is full, the dead will walk the earth — ¡Los Walking Dead! — on Univsion!

[Mas…]

Swiss band Pizza Prostata says ‘Buenas Tardes, Innuendo’ (video)

by MOON GUAC November 4, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Swiss band Pizza Prostata says ‘Buenas Tardes, Innuendo’ (video)

Bern, Switzerland band Pizza Prostata wishes a good afternoon to Innuendo.. The band, aside from using random Spanish words as lyrics, specializes in “great songs, badly played, but with passion.“

[Mas…]

Freddy Fender Hispanic Heritage Music Video: ‘Cielito Lindo’

by MOON GUAC September 25, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Freddy Fender Hispanic Heritage Music Video: ‘Cielito Lindo’

Ai, yai, yai yai! The late great Tex-Mex music superstar Freddy Fender has his way with the 1882 ranchera classic Cielito Lindo. But do you know the words? ¡Ajua! Here are the lyrics via Wikipedia:

[Mas…]

UPDATED: GTA5 TV: Learn Spanish with ‘Paco the Taco!’*

by Comic Saenz September 18, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for UPDATED: GTA5 TV: Learn Spanish with ‘Paco the Taco!’*

*UPDATED WITH (POTENTIALLY NSFW) VIDEO 4:40 PM PDT Sept. 19, 2013: Tired of jacking cars? Committed enough crimes for today? Come on home, sit on the couch, spark a blunt and learn everyday Spanish with Paco the Taco, new on Grand Theft Auto 5 TV. WTF? Your cable company doesn’t carry GTA5? Huh? You have […]

[Mas…]

OMG WTF: ‘La Bamba’ from far away — Indian reality TV (video)

by Chale Knickerbocker September 11, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for OMG WTF: ‘La Bamba’ from far away — Indian reality TV (video)

Maybe it’s enough to say it’s cool that La Bamba has made friends around the world ever since Pacoima pocho Ritchie Valens recorded it in 1958. [For you kids: Valens dropped a vinyl single which went totally viral -- one of rock 'n' roll's all-time Top 500 jams.] But can we also giggle at this […]

[Mas…]