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threevatosIt’s time for old girlfriends, secret tears and family dynamics in the latest episode of Hey Vato!

When Chuy’s sister Angie hogs the bathroom taking selfies, Smiley interrupts the subsequent sibling discussion with insight from author, artist and poet e.e. cummings. [Mas…]

shirtmodel(PNS reporting from EAST LOS) Ruben Covarrubias astounded family and friends here Sunday night when he admitted that the history of Cinco de Mayo didn’t concern him and he’d always thought “May 5 was Mexican Independence Day, so like so what?!”

“I don’t care what it’s about, yo!” he told everyone within earshot of the backyard grill. “I just always celebrated it with MEChA and at school. Partay!”

Friends and family at the Covarrubias’ weekly carne asada were aghast. Some reconsidered whether they’d be driving back to El Sereno next week, multiple witness reported. [Mas…]

burritotweeterMeet @BurritoPatents (aka Burrito Inventions), a bot by @JoeMFox, which reports hourly on developments on the cutting edge of burrito-related patents.

This is why Al Gore invented the Internets. [Mas…]


Millennials — this means you! Whether you need a fitness regime for your swiping fingers, interval training for Instagram, improved low-impact Twitter technique or advanced aerobic Facebook, you need to be @ #TheGym. Ask about February special prices for Mega-Gigabyte Torrent Training™, Skiing with Skype™, and Building Better Abs with Bitcoin™.


He’s Mr. Selfie. He lives in London and apparently sleeps alone. Does he resemble anyone you know?

hashtagheatmapSome Twitter users are just unclear on the concept, especially when it comes to the appropriate use of the #JeSuisCharlie hashtag, the most popular ever (“heat map,” above). The viral slogan — coined after the massacre at Paris satire magazine Charlie Hebdo — affirms support of free expression.

French-deficient? “Je suis Charlie” means “I am Charlie.”

The Pochodores combed the Internets for these Pocho Ocho top Twitter #JeSuisCharlie hashtag fails:

8.
vadertweet [Mas…]

daveandbusterstweetThe Twitterverse exploded with charges of racism yesterday following pork-pushing restauranteurs Dave & Buster’s #TacoTuesday Tweet fail. (Photo of Tweet, since deleted from the company’s timeline.)

Even pimp-my-product professional journal AdWeek was pained by the chain’s gigantic boner:

And your massive brand Twitter fail of the day goes to … Dave & Buster’s! [Mas…]


That symbol we used to call the “number sign” or “pound sign” that they now call as “hash sign” — # — is ruining social media. All the cool kids have switched over to what we used to call the “percent sign” — % — to make social media a better place for you and me, especially me. Try the new % F*ckyer sign and find out yourself! [NSFW adult language.]

Shock confession! Local man doesn’t care what Cinco de Mayo is about

by María Purísima May 5, 2014 El Now
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(PNS reporting from EAST LOS) Ruben Covarrubias astounded family and friends here Sunday night when he admitted that the meaning of Cinco de Mayo didn’t concern him and he’d always thought “May 5 was Mexican Independence Day, so like so what?!” “I don’t care what it’s about,” he told everyone within earshot of the backyard […]

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Turkey cracks down, stuffs Twitter (toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz March 27, 2014 Cartoons
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You won’t believe these celebrity New Year’s Resolutions on Twitter!

by Lucida Grandé December 31, 2013 Cultura
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Texas Sen. Ted Cruz

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MEX A&E suspends ‘Guac Dynasty’ jefe after hate Tweet

by Especial Correspondents December 22, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) Felipe Roberto, star of the reality show Guac Dynasty, which follows the Roberto clan of rude and crude avocado wranglers through their struggle with weeds, bugs and family dysfunction, has been suspended by the Mexican Arte y Entretenimiento TV network (MEX A&E) after his hateful Tweet about Americans went viral, […]

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Religious figures to Guadalupe: You’re a ‘miraculous appearance hog’

by María Purísima December 11, 2013 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) Leading Catholic personalities gathered here this week to address a simmering controversy in the official Divine Advent & Manifestation Union (DAMU): members claim that La Virgen de Guadalupe (photo, center) is a publicity hog when it comes to miraculous appearances. “Can’t the Son of God just miraculously appear on a slice of […]

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Haters Gonna Hate: Big map of racist/hateful Tweets (infographic)

by WIZ E. WHIG, Ph.D. December 6, 2013 Cartoons
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The infographic map-heads at FloatingSheep.org analyzed geo-tagged Tweets from one week in November last year to generate a hate map of the U.S. Surprise, surprise — the Old Confederacy had the most haters when slurs about Latinos (Tweets using the word “wetback” and “spick”), African-Americans (“nigger”), Asians (“chink,” “gook”) were tallied (pan-racist map, above.) [Click […]

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Vine video: @WilW Wheaton eats chips and salsa

by DON JUAN GAMERA October 21, 2013 Cultura
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Wil Wheaton (@WilW on Twitter) sure loves him some chips and salsa. [Hover over, then click the speaker icon in the top left corner of the video for Wheaton’s incisive commentary.] PREVIOUSLY ON WIL WHEATON: Spanglish with @wilw Wheaton: Today’s word is ‘pupacabras’ (Vine)

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Breaking: U.S. braces for social media #TMITuesday

by Victor Payan October 7, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON, DC) With their employer, the United States government, crippled by a shutdown, bored furloughed federal workers here plan to make tomorrow “TMI Tuesday.” The social media campaign, which carries the slogan Brace Yourself Before You Face Yourself, has Washington insiders shaking, fearing a sleazy slew of photographs from GOP fundraisers, Dick […]

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Geraldo Rivera Tweets selfie of his ‘foot’ (photo)

by PINHEAD HELLRAISER September 18, 2013 El Now
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Trying acupuncture to reduce pain in foot killed by botched back surgery pic.twitter.com/zfJlGU1nvS — Geraldo Rivera (@GeraldoRivera) September 17, 2013 The award-winning TV newsman also shows a little leg. PREVIOUSLY ON GERALDO RIVERA SELFIES: NYPD fingers, pinches ‘twisted’ Geraldo Rivera in ‘sexting’ prob Scary Naked Geraldo photo slashes ‘Walking While Black’ crim

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Scary Naked Geraldo photo slashes ‘Walking While Black’ crime

by Lalo Alcaraz July 22, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from FLORIDA) Neighborhood Watch volunteers across the nation’s gated communities are posting Twitter photos of Naked Geraldo to frighten off dangerous junk food-toting hoodie-wearing kids. Award-winning journalist Geraldo Rivera, who proclaimed in his initial Tweet that “Seventy is the new Sexty,” snapped the nude photo of himself in the bathroom in order to […]

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NYPD fingers, pinches ‘twisted’ Geraldo Rivera in ‘sexting’ probe

by Santino J. Rivera July 22, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from NEW YORK CITY) Cable news reporter Geraldo Rivera was named a “person of interest” Sunday and detained for questioning in a “sexting” case by police here after he posted a twisted semi-nude “selfie” on Twitter. [Editor’s Note: Ruh, roh! Looks like Mr. Rivera has deleted that Tweet! But that’s the photo from […]

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Elise @buttronica Roedenbeck VS the Pope — on Twitter (video)

by Comic Saenz July 19, 2013 Cultura
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Our MiJA, Elise @buttronica Roedenbeck, doesn’t want much. She just wants additional followers on the Twitter as part of her plan for worldwide social media domination. Follow Elise to win a small box lunch with individual carafe of wine plus other cool incentives like scribbled notes and video winks (must be over legal drinking age […]

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The Pocho Ocho top favorite ways racists try to tell me off

by Lalo Alcaraz July 16, 2013 Cultura
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It comes with the territory — when you tackle controversial issues you attract controversial responses.  Or, as I like to call it, Crackpot Racist Hate Mail From Right Wing Nut Jobs (CRHMFRWNJ for short.) Some of the messages scrawled on paper bags in crayon (and blood?) are mailed to various newspapers around the country that […]

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Online surge of Constitutional Law, Bible experts slows the Internets

by Comic Saenz June 27, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from SILICON VALLEY) The Internets slowed to a virtual crawl yesterday as millions of experts in Constitutional Law and The Holy Bible took to Twitter and Facebook to educate ignorant netizens about the God-hating freedom-attacking Supreme Court ruling on same-sex marriage. “It was definitely a brownout, dude,” according to 18-year-old Jaime “Twitchy” Loftwich, who […]

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PNS*Hot*Flash: Area man pissed he never heard of sizzurp

by MEZCAL WORTHINGTON March 19, 2013 El Now
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BREAKING ÑEWS: (PNS reporting from BIG BEAR, CA) Emerging from a long weekend “off the fuckin’ grid, dude” spent in an isolated mountain cabin with neither Internet nor cell service, area software programmer Carlos Perez has told friends he is angry he missed the entire Lil Wayne near death episode.

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@MexicanMitt Romney: The Estate of the Union esta chingada

by MEXICAN MITT ROMNEY February 13, 2013 El Now
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Hola Gueyes! This is my Live Tweet/State of the Union response chingadera. Will someone please get me a water, that bottle I’m looking at is right out of reach. CHINGAO! MEXIPHONE CHECK, JUAN TU, JUAN TU HIJOLE EL TWITTER IS ESLOW, IT’S MORE CLOGGED THAN THE TOILET AT EL TORITO HEY OBAMA, STOP TOUCHING THE […]

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