In a four-hour televised speech to his nation late Sunday, Chavez called Obama the best hope for Socialism in the Western Hemisphere. The left-wing strong man had previously endorsed the President in September.
“El Obama deserves your support, gringos,” he said in a rare foray into English. “He may not admit to being a Marxist-Leninist but inside he is as red as your Danny Glover and Oliver Estone. “
“I like Kenyans. And Obama has the approval of mis hermanos Jorge Soros y Saul Alinsky. The people — collectivized — will never be defeated!”
Chavez told his country he felt specially blessed by God since his cancer treatments in Cuba. “I felt clothed in a track suit of Divine Love,” he said. “And I’d like to send a special shout out to the musicians whose creativity sustained me during radiation and chemotherapy. I’d Rather Be With Ju by Bootsy Collins is mi new jamón.”
Obama does not smell like sulfuro, Chavez added, unlike his predecessor Pres. George W. Bush. “He has a pleasing aroma like he eats always the halal goat curry, Indonesian style maybe. And kales. He smells like he eats lots of kales from the White House garden. I first thought he was a ‘save the kales’ guy, pero no.”
POCHO ÑEWS SERVICE PNS IS A WHOLLY-FICTITIOUS SUBSIDIARY OF POCHISMO INC., A CALIFORNIA CORPORATION, WHO IS A PERSON ACCORDING TO THE SUPREME COURT. DON’T ASK US, WE JUST WORK HERE.