elise roedenbeck

As Hispanic Heritage Month 2022 ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

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cucahhm

(PNS reporting from BROOKLYN) Hispanic Heritage Month is ending, and without the corporate-approved celebration as a focus, local members of the Hispanic/Latino/Latinx community here aren’t really sure how they can go on being local members of the local Hispanic/Latino/Latinx community here.

“What now?” lamented Brooklyn native and prolific bloguera Marielena Gutierrez (photo, below).

“Should I tell people to call me Mary Ellen for the remaining 11 months of the year? It’s not like they ever pronounce it right anyway,” she wrote on her PobrePickle blog.

Mas…As Hispanic Heritage Month 2022 ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

As Hispanic Heritage Month 2021 ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

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cucahhm

(PNS reporting from BROOKLYN) Hispanic Heritage Month is ending, and without the corporate-approved celebration as a focus, local members of the Hispanic/Latino/Latinx community here aren’t really sure how they can go on being local members of the local Hispanic/Latino/Latinx community here.

“What now?” lamented Brooklyn native and prolific bloguera Marielena Gutierrez (photo, below).

“Should I tell people to call me Mary Ellen for the remaining 11 months of the year? It’s not like they ever pronounce it right anyway,” she wrote on her PobrePickle blog.

Mas…As Hispanic Heritage Month 2021 ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

As Hispanic Heritage Month 2020 ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

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cucahhm

(PNS reporting from BROOKLYN) Hispanic Heritage Month is ending, and without the corporate-approved celebration as a focus, local members of the Hispanic/Latino community here aren’t really sure how they can go on being local members of the local Hispanic/Latino community here.

“What now?” lamented Brooklyn native and prolific bloguera Marielena Gutierrez (photo)

“Should I tell people to call me Mary Ellen for the remaining 11 months of the year? It’s not like they ever pronounce it right anyway,” she wrote on her PobrePickle blog.

Mas…As Hispanic Heritage Month 2020 ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

As Hispanic Heritage Month 2019 ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

by

cucahhm

(PNS reporting from BROOKLYN) Hispanic Heritage Month is ending, and without the corporate-approved celebration as a focus, local members of the Hispanic/Latino community here aren’t really sure how they can go on being local members of the local Hispanic/Latino community here.

“What now?” lamented Brooklyn native and prolific bloguera Marielena Gutierrez (photo)

“Should I tell people to call me Mary Ellen for the remaining 11 months of the year? It’s not like they ever pronounce it right anyway,” she wrote on her PobrePickle blog.

Mas…As Hispanic Heritage Month 2019 ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

Is my slip showing? Gender and vulnerability in stand-up comedy

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What does it mean to be vulnerable? This question comes up quite a bit in comedy. You might hear someone say, “oh, he’s so raw, so vulnerable…” It’s a common form of praise, usually for male comedians.

Former Late Show booker, Eddie Brill, named vulnerability as his favorite quality in a comedian. He seldom, if ever, booked women. Eventually, he was fired for his statements in the now infamous New York Times article. However, the crux of his argument was that good comedians reveal their weaknesses and women just don’t do that.

Mas…Is my slip showing? Gender and vulnerability in stand-up comedy

By @buttronica: I ramble and maybe I’m too dark at times, but damn!

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poniesEconomists say once a person has been unemployed for six months it is highly unlikely they will reenter the workforce.

It’s been a year since I was fired from my job and I feel like a BIG GIANT LOSER.

It wasn’t anything I did in particular. I thought for sure that one time I asked Floyd Mayweather if “he likes to take his work home with him” would do me in, alas, it was far more uneventful.

“We’ve decided not to renew your contract.”

“Um, OK.”

And it’s not like I’m totally unemployed. I regularly walk a dog named Jimmy Fallon — this causes great confusion when I nonchalantly say, “Jimmy Fallon growled at me today,” (though for the most part he is quite lovely, other than eating his own poop).

Mas…By @buttronica: I ramble and maybe I’m too dark at times, but damn!

As Hispanic Heritage Month ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

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cucahhmsadbloguera(PNS reporting from BROOKLYN) Hispanic Heritage Month is over, and without the corporate-approved celebration as a focus, local members of the Hispanic/Latino community here aren’t really sure how they can go on being local members of the local Hispanic/Latino community here.

“What now?” lamented Brooklyn native and prolific bloguera Marielena Gutierrez (photo, right.)

“Should I tell people to call me Mary Ellen for the remaining 11 months of the year? It’s not like they ever pronounce it right anyway,” she wrote on her PobrePickle blog.

Mas…As Hispanic Heritage Month ends, Brooklyn Hispanics try to carry on

Elise @Buttronica Roedenbeck: Do computers zap our creativity? (video)

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elisecomputerMiJA Elise Roedenbeck, formerly a professional geek*, wonders if computers make our brains less creative. Since half of Elise’ cabeza is exposed to Mutant Moon Rays from Outer Espace synergistically multiplied by the Reality Distortion Field generated by her MacBook Pro, it was urgent she get an answer as quickly as possible. In this case, it took her only 3:03.

PRO TIP: Elise’s high tech screen name on the Twitter is @buttronica, so you know she’s right, especially when POCHO Migrant Editor Al Madrigal shows up on her list as #1 most creative comedian. 🙂

Here’s Buttronica’s video:

Mas…Elise @Buttronica Roedenbeck: Do computers zap our creativity? (video)

Official Report: La Migra’s border drone results not on fleek (videos)

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droneThe Department of Homeland Security Inspector General may not have the sad, exactly, but his end-of-2014 report on border-patrolling drones was not very happy.

Tio Sam, the Inspector General recommended, should spend his Migra-Industrial Complex money somewhere else. More drones are not on fleek, the report concluded.

The LexisNexis newsroom pulled this quote from the report:

U.S. Customs and Border Protection’s Unmanned Aircraft System Program Does Not Achieve Intended Results or Recognize All Costs of Operations

Although CBP’s Unmanned Aircraft System program contributes to border security, after 8 years, CBP cannot prove that the program is effective because it has not developed performance measures.

Mas…Official Report: La Migra’s border drone results not on fleek (videos)

Elise @Buttronica Roedenbeck reads Amazon product reviews (video)

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Reading is hard. That’s why we’re happy to feature our MiJA, Elise Roedenbeck (she’s @Buttronica on the Twitter), reading customer reviews of Amazon.com products. Now you can sit back, chillax, watch and listen instead of trying to pick out the words, with all those darn letters. Today’s selection includes a dramatic reading of a review shared by the Starship Enterprise’ most festive officer, George Takei.

PREVIOUSLY ON READING REVIEWS ALOUD:

Mas…Elise @Buttronica Roedenbeck reads Amazon product reviews (video)

Watch: Elise Roedenbeck reads ‘Dinosaur Porn’ (Yes, it’s a thing!)

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POCHO amiga Elise Roedenbeck (who is sill on our masthead as NYC Bureau Chief Emeritus the fact of which we are periodically required to remind you of as a result of the settlement order, without admitting or denying guilt and/or culpability) explores the steamy sexy world of Dino Porn. These big hunks o’ meat are horny and your scent is just perfect. Elise is @buttronica on the Twitter. Don’t tell T-Rex we were sexting!

Elise Roedenbeck: Top porn search terms by state (video)

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Sweet dreams are made of this -- who am I to disagree?
I travel the world and the seven seas. Everybody's looking for something.

Elise Roedenbeck — she’s @buttronica on the Twitter — learned the same lesson when she investigated the top porn search terms broken down by state. Everybody’s looking for something. They’re looking for massage. And cream pie. And cream pie massages. In somebody else’s state, right? Don’t be so sure.

PREVIOUSLY ON STUFF BROKEN DOWN BY STATES:

Mas…Elise Roedenbeck: Top porn search terms by state (video)

Write, shoot, draw for POCHO and become rich and famous*

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You could be rich and famous*

That’s right — you sitting there in your PJs, bunny slippers and Frida Kahlo unibrow.

After all, you know better than other people on the Internets, and if you’re so smart, why aren’t you rich?

Donut despair! You can turn your Aztlan acumen into fame y fortune in a matter of weeks, and

It’s easier than you think.

These are the factoids:

This is a proven method that

  • propelled openly-Chicano Lalo Alcaraz and Gustavo Arellano to writing gigs at a new Fox sitcom,
  • zoomed actor and comic Al Madrigal to The Daily Show and
  • teleported NYC standup Elise Roedenbeck from dimly-lit stages in the East Village to the bright TV lights of the new FUSION network in Miami.

Mas…Write, shoot, draw for POCHO and become rich and famous*

Classic Elise @Buttronica Roedenbeck: ‘Mija Weekly Valentine’ (video)

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It’s Valentine’s Day with Elise Roedenbeck (AKA @Buttronica on the Twitter) in this 2013 episode of Mija Weekly! Fall in love all over again with drones, skimpy outfits, GOP immigrant-haters and learn the true meaning of Valentine’s Day. And, says Elise, try not to go into a diabetic coma.

Where is Elise now, you ask?

Mas…Classic Elise @Buttronica Roedenbeck: ‘Mija Weekly Valentine’ (video)

Contribute to POCHO, get discovered, become rich and famous*

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You could be rich and famous*

That’s right — you sitting there in your PJs, bunny slippers and Frida Kahlo unibrow.

After all, you know better than other people on the Internets, and if you’re so smart, why aren’t you rich?

Donut despair! You can turn your Aztlan acumen into fame y fortune in a matter of weeks, and

It’s easier than you think.

These are the factoids:

This is a proven method that

  • propelled openly-Chicano Lalo Alcaraz and Gustavo Arellano to writing gigs at a new Fox sitcom,
  • zoomed actor and comic Al Madrigal to The Daily Show and
  • teleported NYC standup Elise Roedenbeck from dimly-lit stages in the East Village to the bright TV lights of the new FUSION network in Miami.

Mas…Contribute to POCHO, get discovered, become rich and famous*

That new mammal they discovered in the Andes? Delicious! (video)

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It’s called an olinguito. Freakin delicious, too! Elise Roedenbeck reports:

Olinguito, the cute new mammal discovered in the Andes, is nature’s newest little surprise. The small creature, related to the raccoon, looks like a cross between an Ewok and a rat. However, anyone who’s ever lived in the Andes can tell you meat is meat.

Using my connections in the Andean cloud forest meat network, we decided to cook up some critter using my favorite Peruvian recipe, lomo saltado. Except the lomo in this case is mountain rat (a.k.a. olinguito).

Elise @buttronica Roedenbeck VS the Pope — on Twitter (video)

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Our MiJA, Elise @buttronica Roedenbeck, doesn’t want much. She just wants additional followers on the Twitter as part of her plan for worldwide social media domination. Follow Elise to win a small box lunch with individual carafe of wine plus other cool incentives like scribbled notes and video winks (must be over legal drinking age and legal box-eating age in your jurisdiction.) Vegans — ask about the kale-quinoa bowls!

And then comes along Pope Francis (his handle is @pontifex) who is offering PAPAL INDULGENCES on Twitter. Not PayPal, you geeks, but Papal Indulgences from the Holy Father that shorten your stay in the limbo of Purgatory. What’s our MiJA to do?

[What can we say about Elise Roedenbeck, POCHO’s New Jack City Burro Jefe Emeritus, that hasn’t been ruled out by the terms of the negotiated settlement and mutual release of all claims? Just this: She sure likes butter, and it’s “butt-ronica” not “but-tronica.”]

Elise Roedenbeck Filibusters: ‘How To Do the Wendy’ (video)

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It’s not easy standing up for women’s rights in Texas, but the heroic filibuster by State Sen. Wendy Davis kept the GOP’s anti-abortion SB5 from passing Tuesday night. Our MiJA, Elise Roedenbeck, learned how to Do the Wendy for the camera. [Disclosure: The settlement agreement approved by the judge means we must stay at least 100 yards away from Ms. Roedenbeck, but we can still remind people that she is POCHO’s New Jack City Burro Jefe, Emeritus.]

Kanye West’s ‘I Am A God’ as read by Elise Roedenbeck (video)

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When an important pop culture artifact like a Kanye West CD (or baby) drops, smart pochas y pochos step back from the frenzy and take a dispassionate look at WTF is going on.

That’s why our MiJA, Elise Roedenbeck, at her new gig down there in Miami with Fusion, embarked on a dramatic reading of the West composition I Am A God, from the album Yeezus. (SAFE FOR WORK. ALL LYRICS HAVE BEEN SANITIZED FOR YOUR PROTECTION.)

MiJA Weekly’s Elise Roedenbeck joins new TV network in Miami

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Many have you have written in and asked about Elise Roedenbeck’s MiJA WEEKLY video series and why it disappeared.

We have good news and bad news. Bad news first: There will be no more MiJA WEEKLY.

The good news? Important people in the Network Television World were so taken with Elise and MiJA WEEKLY that they stole her away from us and moved her to Miami where she is joining the new ABC/Univision TV network FUSION.

Felicidades to our hermana Elise and “break a leg” as we say in eshow business.

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