@MexicanMitt on the DNC: THAT CONVENTION ESUCKED!

COMO CHINGA ESE OBAMA.

If this Democratic convention was the FIESTA, then this yobs report is the CRUDA!

There is no bowl of menudo big enough to cure the mess that Barack Obama has failed to clean up after the frat boy party thrown by George W. Bush. Whoops, never mind that I mentioned what’s-his-face.

Even Julian Castro’s Menudo Cook-Off-winning abuela could not boil enough pansa for Americans to stomach four more years of Marxist Socialist Communism Veganism. I have no facts to back that up, but GUATEVER. I don’t need facts, I AM A RICH DUDE.

As for the actual Democrap convention, here’s my review:

Mas…@MexicanMitt on the DNC: THAT CONVENTION ESUCKED!

Opinion: We must fight the anti-Mayan Calendar Illuminati 1% (video)

We might not know anything about them, but Anonymous knows almost everything about us, including stuff THE MAN doesn’t want YOU to know.

The modishly-masked online crusaders will soon shock our chakras with the truth about apocalyptic confluences predicted by the Mayan Calendar and aether-entities from outer espace. Predictably, the Mainstream Media New World Order 1% Wall Street Ivy League Illuminati White Elite is fighting back.

The recent Anonymous blipvert above, for example, was followed by UPenn (founded by life on Mars expert and immigrant hater Benjamin Franklin) joining the Illuminati conspiracy to discredit the Mayan Apocalypse Doomsday 2012 scenario.

One group of chronology-challenged eschatologists even claimed that a recently-discovered calendar — which is older than the Doomsday Calendar — somehow makes the newer calendar wrong. Doh! Illogical!

Mas…Opinion: We must fight the anti-Mayan Calendar Illuminati 1% (video)