Based on the POCHO story “The Talking Dead: No Habla Zombie” by S.J. Rivera.
latino
When ‘The Hobbit’ took back Aztlán: A Latino nerd reads Tolkien
Today the names Smaug and Thorin Oakenshield will enter American pop culture. Dwarves rambling on a reconquista while Gollum plays riddles will reach a new audience because Peter Jackson filmed the nerd classic, The Hobbit — prequel to Lord of the Rings.
Film has more impact than the written word in today’s society and this version will reach a greater number of people than J.R.R. Tolkien’s book ever will. I am overjoyed that this classic will reach a greater number of gente, but I am filled with sadness that a child’s first encounter with The Hobbit will be in a loud theater instead of a quiet library.
Regardless, I look forward seeing my mental images from the book acted out in the big screen. And remembering the hours reading the book, which played a monumental role in my becoming Eres Nerd.
Mas…When ‘The Hobbit’ took back Aztlán: A Latino nerd reads Tolkien
Chino John Wynn thinks it might be easier if he were a Latino (video)
ZOMG! Did epic failure Willard “Mitt” Romney get his idea about how life would be easier he were only a Latino from John Wynn’s stand up comedy routine? And are Mexican-Americans purveyors of “casual racism?”
She replaced Feliz Navidad with ‘Feliz Hanukkah’ (audio)
When Austin resident Trina Hernandez (photo) found out her family had Jewish roots, it allowed her to ditch the commercial aspects of Christmas she had long disliked and connect to a tradition she found more meaningful for her and her son. From NPR’s Latino USA with Maria Hinojosa.
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How to eshake hands Chicano style (CA y TX versions) [video]
In this video for POCHO U’s Gabacho Outreach Program (POCHO U, GOP!) I demonstrate the Chicano Handshake including a California version, a Texas version and a version with extra love. Why can’t we be friends?
So let it be written: Now I am become ‘Hispanic’
In The Beginning: For 37 years I lived my life without realizing I was Hispanic.
A few days ago, while waiting for the bus, I overheard a conversation that changed my life. A gentleman was speaking Japanese with several ladies, and when they reverted to English, the ladies asked him, “Well if you’re not from Japan, what nationality are you?” He replied that he was from Brazil. This did not surprise me, as there are over 1.5 million Brazilians of Japanese descent.
His response did make me wonder, however, about how Americans define “Hispanic,” whether this gentleman would consider himself Hispanic, and whether he met the U.S. government’s definition(s) of Hispanic.
Pocho Ñews Insight: Mal*Mart gives back to local communities (video)
This short educational video from Mal★Mart explains how the retail chain is a good neighbor, supporting local communities and creating jobs all across America — with a smile. The case study features Latina entrepreneur Maria Muñoz of Maria’s Flan.
Mas…Pocho Ñews Insight: Mal*Mart gives back to local communities (video)
To: sw6n-34kd31fa8@dcjobs.craigslist.org Re: GOP Latino Wrangler
Dear Party of Lincoln:
I am very interested in the Latino Wrangler opening at the Republican National Committee you advertised on CraigsList.
My wife is half Mexican, my son is one-quarter Mexican and I have been to Mexico four times for cheap lobster, not that anyone's ethnicity would be used as a qualification for this job. I'm white, of course.
Mas...To: sw6n-34kd31fa8@dcjobs.craigslist.org Re: GOP Latino Wrangler
Pocho Ocho ways you gabacho guys might be Hispandering
Since the election, all the cool guys want to be Latinos and maybe you do too, Mr. White, Non-Hispanic-American. We understand, but we want to make sure you don’t go overboard. Peep our pocho ocho ways you might be Hispandering:
8. Goodbye iPod, hello maracas
7. Your name is now spelled Bíll Coñnelly
6. You call the guys in your golf foursome “mi gente”
5. You lower your Prius
4. You change your name to Geraldo
3. Lifetime membership in Chest Hair Club for Men
2. Complain “it would be easier if I were Latino”
And the numero uno way you might be Hispandering is…
You’re so Hispanic, you probably think this video is about you
Univision thinks this is the New American Reality. Is it your reality?
Contagious Latinophilia hits U.S.; Boehner, Hannity, Arpaio infected
(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON, D.C.) Public health officials are concerned about contagious Latinophilia that has spread with breathtaking speed across America since Bronco Bama’s reelection last week.
Former anti-Latino pundits and politicians who for years went out of their way to make life miserable for Latinos are now succumbing to what scientists believe may be a viral condition.
“Almost immediately after the election — which may have been decided by the massive Latino vote — reports began flooding our offices,” Robert McLean, Director of Public Health Outbreaks at the Centers for Disease Control in Washington, D.C. said this morning at a press conference.
“All across the nation an increasing number of white men have expressed a new need to reach out to Latinos,” he said.
Mas…Contagious Latinophilia hits U.S.; Boehner, Hannity, Arpaio infected
Laugh your nalgas off with ‘The Best of Culture Clash’ (video)
Enjoy this hour-long compilation of skits from the pioneering Chicano Los Angeles comedy troupe’s television program. LOLz guaranteed or your money back.
Mexican Mitt’s Last Espeech: I’m in it to guin it, by any beans necessary
MY FINAL ESPEECH TO THE NATION BEFORE I RULE OVER IT
AJUA!
Viejas and Gentlemen, voters, suppressed voters, this is my final espeech to you before I win the election tomorrow for the Presidency of the United Estates. This is the most important Presidential election of your lifetime, if you were born this year.
I know, you are RELIEVED that this long national nightmare will be finally over. I, too, am sick of the ads, the constant campaigning, having to look at my running mate what’s-his-face, but especially I am sick of Bronco Bamma.
But enough about Black Reagan. Or the country. You all want to know how this affects ME, Mexican Mitt Romney. Campaigning is hard. It’s almost like a yob, which I have not held in a long time. Despite waking up in various strange hotels with Mormon wood every day, I still miss my 14 RANCHOS. (For the language-impaired, “rancho” is Spanish for “polygamous Mormon compound.”)
Mas…Mexican Mitt’s Last Espeech: I’m in it to guin it, by any beans necessary
Your Mitt Romney Spanish TV bronzer makeup tutorial (video)
It’s not easy being brown, as Mitt Romney’s Univision appearance demonstrated. Here’s the right way to get brown with la gente. Attention white people: This is a super idea for that special hot date not to mention Halloween!
Mas…Your Mitt Romney Spanish TV bronzer makeup tutorial (video)
End of Hispanic Heritage Month leaves many unsure how to go on
(PNS reporting from BROOKLYN) Hispanic Heritage Month is over and without the corporate-approved celebration as a focus, members of the local Hispanic/Latino community aren’t really sure how they can go on being members of the local Hispanic/Latino community.
“Where do I go from here?” lamented Brooklyn native and prolific bloguera Marielena Gutierrez (photo).
“Should I tell people to call me Mary Ellen for the remaining 11 months of the year? It’s not like they ever pronounce it right anyway,” she wrote on her PobrePickle blog.
Mas…End of Hispanic Heritage Month leaves many unsure how to go on
Rosie Perez to Romney: Being a Latina is SO much easier! (video)
Dear Governor Romney: You were so totally right about how much easier it would be if you were a Latino. Even luckier, a Latina with a vagina!
Did you like this video? We sure do! Pero k lastima, so many people came to see it this morning our servers crashed. We need more and better gear. Can you help POCHO make and serve up more ñews y satire with a contribution? Read our clever pitch and kick in $10 or $20 if you can. ¡Gracias!
Bain Capital’s Mal*Mart gives back to local communities (video)
This short educational video from Mal★Mart (a Bain Capital subsidiary) explains how the retail chain is a good neighbor, supporting local communities and creating jobs all across America — with a smile. The case study features Latina entrepreneur Maria Muñoz of Maria’s Flan.
Latino-lover Romney visits a Chipotle store for a photo opportunity
Latino-loving GOP presidential hopeful Mitt Romney stopped by a Denver Chipotle outlet for a photo-opportunity today. What’s for lonche, Mitt?
- MORE PHOTOS LIKE THIS: BFFs Mitt, Darryl visit Latino sites for Hispanic Heritage Month (photos)
Romney campaign’s latest commercial shot on Olvera Street (video)
Gov. Mitt Romney reaches out to Latino voters in this new Hispanic Heritage Month commercial filmed in downtown Los Angeles’ historic Olvera Street neighborhood.
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Sector Sabana Abajo ‘We Are Latinos’ (video) English/Spanish lyrics
Sector Abana Abajo presents We Are Latinos featuring singer Jackie Santos. This song is dedicated to all the world’s Latinos, especially to those who struggle every day in the U.S.
Here are the lyrics in Spanish and English courtesy Los Padrotes Music:
Mas…Sector Sabana Abajo ‘We Are Latinos’ (video) English/Spanish lyrics
Wild! @MexicanMitt Romney and frat bros in music video: ‘Dinero’
In his freshman year at Stanford, @MexicanMitt Romney and his Kappa Lota Gelta fraternity brothers made a music video under the name Joe King Carrasco and the Crowns. In retrospect, Dinero seems prophetic, showing the future Bean Capitalist’s magic carpet knack for amassing large amounts of other people’s cash. (The future Mrs. Ann Romney is on keyboards.)
In other news, @MexicanMitt’s campaign released a new poster:
Mas…Wild! @MexicanMitt Romney and frat bros in music video: ‘Dinero’
‘Mitt Romney Latino Outreach’ ad seeks Colorado votes (video)
Gov. Mitt Romney’s campaign has released another commercial aimed at Latino voters. This one is designed for the Colorado electorate.
Ñewsweek: Romney el moreno; no photo, no voto; santo monkey
POCHO’s ñewsweek was all about the Mittster as the GOP wannabe wished he were a puro Latino, dissed half of America and looked mysteriously moreno on a Univision appearance.
But wait, there’s more! Sarah Silverman explained how the GOP is trying to keep you from voting, Latinas have racist vaginas, and that new monkey species discovered in Africa reminded us of…JESUS?
The links:
Mas…Ñewsweek: Romney el moreno; no photo, no voto; santo monkey
Esteban Colberto explains Romney’s Latino outreach effort (video)
It’s not going to be easy for Gov. Mitt Romney to win Latino votes, but Esteban Colberto lays out the possible approaches
Al Madrigal, Jessica Williams to Jon Stewart: Minorities = lucky (video)
Mitt Romney wishes he were a Latino because it would bring him advantages he didn’t have as a rich white kid from the suburbs. On The Daily Show, POCHO Migrant Editor Al Madrigal and his minority TDS office-mate Jessica Williams explain to Jon Stewart how that works.
The Mitt Romney is on Univisión’s hot seat drinking game
GOP Presidential nominee Gov. Mitt Romney will be in the hot seat on Univisión at 7PM PDT tonight. Anchors Jorge Ramos and María Elena Salinas will ask him questions in Spanish, and Latino wannabe Romney will respond in English.
It’s an ideal time to bust out your Arpaio Viejo™ Tequila for a drinking game! Every time Mitt Romney does something from Column A, take a drink according to the rules in Column B:
Mas…The Mitt Romney is on Univisión’s hot seat drinking game