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What are America’s Pocho Ocho Top Brownest Jobs?

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whitejobsfThe Atlantic analyzed the stats and guess what!? Some professions in the United Estates are positively teeming with white people — jobs like veterinarian, espeech sangwich pathologist and meelrye (chart excerpt, above).

Hurm, we said, perhaps we can fabricate a similar list of America’s brownest jobs.

“So let it be written, so let it be done!” said Pharoah, another white dude. And we did. Here’s our list of America’s Pocho Ocho Top Brownest Jobs:

8. Piñata Fluffer

7. Chief Cleavage Officer for Spanish Language TV Network News Division

6. Tia Guadalupe Gutierrez Santa Maria de Los Angeles y Zacatecas

Mas…What are America’s Pocho Ocho Top Brownest Jobs?

America pauses for Ricky Martin Luther King Jr. Day 2015

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(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON, D.C.) America will pause Monday to remember the life and message of Ricky Martin Luther King Jr., whose Tengo a Dream y Dance! speech changed the nation forever.

Post offices and other public facilities will be closed, banks and stock exchanges are taking the day off and salsa picante and sweet potato pie – his favorite snack combo – will go on sale all across America. Monday’s holiday honors RMLK’s 39th birthday.

Despite his tragic death in 2007 (he was shot and killed by the president of his fan club before an appearance in Dallas) King’s promotion of “love, equality, justice, innocence, malice, refuge, oppression, freedom” has continued to resonate for confused African-Americans, Latinos, Afro-Latinos, Chicanx and Anglx alike.

Mas…America pauses for Ricky Martin Luther King Jr. Day 2015

Video Hall of Montezuma: Esteban Colberto’s Greatest Latino Hits

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colberthispanicHe’s gone from the Report, but Esteban Colberto will always be in our hearts, and online, as long as these video links stay alive.

Check ’em out:

Ask A Mexican: Why do Salvadorans and Mexicans hate so much? (video)

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gussalvadorGustavo ¡Ask A Mexican! Arellano steps back into the video limelight to ponder the question: Why do Mexicans (and Mexican-Americans) and Salvadorans (and Salvadoran-Americans) hate each other so much? Is it because Salvadoran horchata is better than Mexican horchata? And the fact that pupusas kick gorditas’ culinary nalgas? Or are they just following an age-old American tradition of hatin’ on the newbies that goes back at least to Benjamin Franklin?

Mas…Ask A Mexican: Why do Salvadorans and Mexicans hate so much? (video)

1940s Style: Orquesta de Don Ramon ‘Chicano Boogie’ (video)

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It’s not much of a video but it rules as a wild examplar of 1940s pachuco “boogie-woogie jitterbug” (like Lalo Guerrero’s Los Chucos Suaves.) This performance features unstoppable rhumba-flavored proto-rock-n-roll beat-me-eight-to-the-bar-boogie-woogie highlighted by shouted Spanglish insanity. Ladies and gentlemen, let’s give a nice welcoming round of applause to Orquesta de Don Ramon as they perform Chicano Boogie. [The artwork is from the Arhoolie compilation album. Yes, the track ends abruptly.]

Can’t rock harder than Lalo Guerrero’s ‘Los Chucos Suaves’ (video)

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Lalo Guerrero is the Father of Chicano Music. His amazing musical legacy (he died in 2005) includes the classic Spanglish “boogie-woogie jitterbug” Los Chucos Suaves – the kick-ass dance-tune inspiration for Zoot Suit (the musical.) We especially like the abstract piano solo that goes off into outer pachucostan and comes back in the nick of time. ¡Que suave!

 

  • [EDITOR’S NOTE]: That’s Pete Alcaraz burning up the keyboard with an insane piano solo. No relation to POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz as far as we know.

 

Our heritage and culture are not your Halloween costume

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ddlmfaceA school in our neighborhood recently held a “Dress as Your Heritage Day.”

For one Friday, students were encouraged to wear items representing their backgrounds, and some did. Students walked around campus in a combination of family heirlooms and seemingly exaggerated symbols to reflect their racial/ethnic groups.

The rationale underlying this day was cultural celebration, and families and students were representing their own heritages in ways that they wanted. On the face of it, this seemed like good ole’ fashion fun where dressing up breaks the routine of school and students show-off their family backgrounds.

Mas…Our heritage and culture are not your Halloween costume

My friend’s new movie, ‘The Book of Life,’ is lush, hilarious (photos)

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MariachisThe Book of Life opens today in theaters nationwide. This lush and hilarious Day of the Dead-inspired movie is by my friend Jorge Gutierrez and film giant Guillermo del Toro.

I was fortunate enough to be invited to the flick’s “red carpet” premiere Sunday, and I had the time of my life. It was a “bucket list” experience, and I want to share some of the images and sounds from that morning of movie madness.

Highlights included photobombing the stars, taking a selfie with Diego Luna, and making Ice Cube snarl.

Mas…My friend’s new movie, ‘The Book of Life,’ is lush, hilarious (photos)

In the name of Jesus! This Mexican kid is harassing me! (video)

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Too much caffeine? A “Christian” lady in an Oklahoma coffee shop has hella angry feels. “In the name of Jesus!” she exclaims. “This Mexican kid is harassing me!” We’re confused. Do you think his name might be Jesús? The video is from 2011, but crazy H8RZ are forever.

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