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Expect these Pocho Ocho ‘surprises’ in the State of the Union

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obamabackWhite House insiders indicate the President’s State of the Union address tonight will have a few surprises for the Congressional and TV audiences.

Here are the top eight:

8. The NSA will intercept Republicans’ text messages to each other and display them on the JumboTron in real time

7. President Obama will be sporting snazzy new Uncle Sugar costume

6. Mass wedding performed according to Sharia Law

Mas…Expect these Pocho Ocho ‘surprises’ in the State of the Union