primaries

Mexican Mitt Romney: DON TROMP ES CON MAN

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trumpyoggacroppedHOLA MIS PINCHES!

I had to speak up, because of this human hot cheeto el DONALD TROMP.

The REPUBLICAN PARTY is turning into one of those fiestas that go on past 3 am and ALL YOUR DRONK TIOS FIGHT and the CHOTA comes to arrest everybody. Pero at this fiesta, no one is arresting the one who ESTARTED ALL THE PEDO: DONALD TROMP.

He is the worst thing to happen to the Republican Fiesta since TED CRUZ Y MARCO RUBIO, the CUBAN BLUNDER TWINS!

TROMP is not the man to represent the GOP. GOP now stands for GET OUT PENDEJO!

Mas…Mexican Mitt Romney: DON TROMP ES CON MAN

Rick Santorum’s Pocho Ocho political proposals

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Although many are shocked by presidential pretender Rick Santorum’s proposal to consider statehood for Puerto Rico if it drops Spanish and espeaks English, it turns out this idea is only the newest of his Brainfarts Brainstorms for America.

Here are the Pocho Ocho:

8. Mexico’s Los Tigres del Norte will be offered citizenship if they lose their stripes

7.  Jews get to go to Catholic Heaven if they stop being, you know, Jews

6. African-Americans get access to high-paying Wall Street jobs when they straighten out that hair thing

Mas…Rick Santorum’s Pocho Ocho political proposals

Mexican Mitt has eye on enchilada for Super Taco Tuesday

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With more than a dozen states and 437 delegates in play, Super Tuesday is the biggest contest of the GOP primaries since Newt Gingrich challenged Mexican Mitt Romney to a wife-off.

Mexican Mitt Romney vows to sweep today’s Super Taco Tuesday Republican presidential contest. “I will win not only the whole enchilada, but the additional taco, the rice and beans, plus the salad,” he told a rally. “And the corn or flour tortillas.”

“I am going to herd all the voters to vote for me like a herd of my chivos on my ranch. In other words, I will make sure you are herd. Herded. Whatevers! Ajua!”

Mas…Mexican Mitt has eye on enchilada for Super Taco Tuesday