recipe

Watch: German Boy Scouts make mass quantities of ‘burritos’

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“Last week we made 90 burritos in about 45 minutes in our Boy Scout tent camp,” video uploader Major Boerns explains:

Mexican / Texmex food is hardly known in Germany at all, so it was a bit of a experiment and therefore I posted this here. The children liked it very much… I know this may be some youtube stuff…but this is for the people who look for some recipes for a huge amount of guests… 🙂 Any ideas for improvement and of course any insults welcome 🙂

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: How ju make chilaquiles for the World Cup

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chilaquilesHello. Is Tia Lencha here. I haves the World Cup feber. Do ju?

Is the feber ju get from watching the World Cups and being so mad at the referees and Holland and wonder who put brujeria on Brazil, that ju want to hit the telebision with a cuchara from the kishen. But I watch the games anyways.

The only gway I can watch the games now is to drink some micheladas to make me want to hit the telebision less times. So today I tell ju how to make chilaquiles to go with the beers that ju need in order to watch the games of the third place and the finals this week.

First the ingrediens:

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Valentine’s Day Hot Salsa Blind Tasting Test

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nolabelsalsaHola. Is Tia Lencha here. Happy Valemtines Day!

I haf the perfect parry idea. What is red and espicy and uses a blindfold? Get jur mind out of the basura (thas trash for you pochos.) Is the Valentimes Hot Sauce Taste Test. This is one test that is fun to estudy for!

What is it? Ju put numbers on little paper cups and then little bit of each of jur favorite hot sauces in the little paper cups. Ju can use Tapatio, Cholula, Bufalo, Red Rooster, what ever ju like. Then ju put a handkerchief to cover someone’s eyes and they taste. They try to guess which hot sauce is in each little cup. Fun, no?

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Valentine’s Day Hot Salsa Blind Tasting Test

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Roasted red Chanukah Christmas Kwanzaa salsa

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jarosalsaHola. Is Tia Lencha here.

Ju want to give presens to eberyone on your Chrismas list or Chanukah or Kwanzaa or Reyes Magos or Chinese Year but ju are short on dinero? No worry! Tia Lencha is going to give ju recipe for to make the oven roast red salsa!

Is nice! Is a good gift for the peoples! And is easy! No like making mole for Turkey Day.

I make this salsa to give to my comadres and the lob it. They have little hearts in their eyes when they see my salsa. They eat with almost eberything. They say they fight their childrens and viejos to eat the last drops of it in the jar. Is that good. Oso, it don’t matter if the peoples are no Mexican. The peoples at my job are no Mexican and they ask me for the salsa.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Roasted red Chanukah Christmas Kwanzaa salsa

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: How I make turkey in Mole Poblano for mijo

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turkeymole640Hola. Is Tia Lencha here. Sorry I no give ju recetas (recipes for ju pochos) for a gwhile. I was closed like the gobernment. Mijo’s daddy no send the cheques for the mijo support. I mad.

Then he go to my house crying because the eskelton eskank he marry left him for another viejo (old man for ju pochos). The viejo had more dinero and drive a troka (thas truck for ju pochos) with plastic bolitas hanging from the bumper. Oh gwell.

In Mexico we say mijo’s daddy got put horns. Mijo’s daddy cry and cry but he no give me my mijo support cheque. I tell him my house is no LenchaCare. He need to pay. He say need money for divorce the eskank. I have to go to the offices to get him to pay.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: How I make turkey in Mole Poblano for mijo

Don’t cry for me Argentina: How NOT to make a taco! (video)

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mexikoshertacoThis is HOW NOT MAKE A TACO … NO NO NO NO

Chef Katsuji Tanabe of Mexikosher got all indignant on his Facebook page, and he wasn’t the only one. Why so mad? It’s that darn Argentinian Chef Maru Botana and her how-to-make-a-taco video.

Argentine Chef Maru Botana Crucified On Twitter For Mocking Mexican Food was the headline in the “Latin Times,” an English-language website despite its name. Maria G. Valdez reporting [*Latin translation by Google below.]:

Mas…Don’t cry for me Argentina: How NOT to make a taco! (video)

Henry’s Kitchen: How to make very sad anytime chili for one (video)

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Henry Phillips, who grew up in New Jersey and got once beaned by a rock his brother threw, prepares Henry’s Anytime Chili for One, but first he needs to convert from metric, and then down-size the family-sized recipe because he’s only making dinner for himself. That involves dividing by seven, which is easier said than done. [NSFW language.]

Latvian TV goes local in Jalisco to learn to make horchata (video)

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  • This is what we figured out from the video and subtitles so far: A food program (and travel show?) from Latvian National TV called Cult Food visits Ajijic in Jalisco, MX (they call it Meksika) to learn from the locals how to make horchata. In Ajijic, the recipe includes condensed milk; Latvian TV host guy Martins Sirmais thinks it is quite delicious.
  • What we still don’t know: WTF? Horchata is big in Latvia?

That new mammal they discovered in the Andes? Delicious! (video)

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It’s called an olinguito. Freakin delicious, too! Elise Roedenbeck reports:

Olinguito, the cute new mammal discovered in the Andes, is nature’s newest little surprise. The small creature, related to the raccoon, looks like a cross between an Ewok and a rat. However, anyone who’s ever lived in the Andes can tell you meat is meat.

Using my connections in the Andean cloud forest meat network, we decided to cook up some critter using my favorite Peruvian recipe, lomo saltado. Except the lomo in this case is mountain rat (a.k.a. olinguito).

Nopal en la frente, nopales for dinner w/ @SaraChicaD (video)

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Sara Inés Calderón (@SaraChicaD on the Twitter) does not look Mexican. But even if she doesn’t have a nopal on her forehead, she has nopales in the frying pan. [With these Vine videos you need to click on the speaker icon in the top left of the image to hear Sara Inés squee.]

NOPAL EN LA FRENTE ROUNDUP:

Oxnard man says ‘Hand of God’ saved family from salsa poisoning

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Jar of Herdez Salsa Casera(PNS reporting from OXNARD, CA) Sam Fuentes is certain he and his kids would be dead today if God hadn’t intervened.

“The Lord Almighty — with a strong hand and an outstretched arm — saved us from the Grim Reaper, that’s for sure!” the Del Norte businessman and father of two told PNS. “That salsa coulda killed us, but it didn’t.”

Fuentes called the POCHO ñewsroom tipline (408-POCHO-28) to share his story.

The brush with death by salsa, his voicemail said, began Sunday morning after church when he began preparing pot roast for his children Selena, 9, and Chente, 11, who were “his” over the weekend per terms of the custody agreement with his ex-wife Evangelina.

“I got the recipe right off the Internets from the Herdez gente. I trust Herdez Salsa Casera. I have toda confianza, just like the label says. It’s Mexico’s favorite and my mom always swore by it,” Fuentes said:

Mas…Oxnard man says ‘Hand of God’ saved family from salsa poisoning

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Delicious aphrodisiac Valentine’s Day salsa

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I’m Elena Maria Celina Carrillo Martinez de los Angeles Delgadillo Trujillo…Lopez. But you can call me Lencha.

Today my son is in his room reading his Naruto muñequito books, so I can chare with you my special recipe for Valentime’s Day.

M’ijo don’t like it when I talk about sexy things because me and his daddy are divorce because his daddy like to stick his weenie ebrywhere.

M’ijo usually checks my espelling but oh gwell. Since I have a little gwhile, I give you the recipe for Aphrodisiac Salsa.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Delicious aphrodisiac Valentine’s Day salsa

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Turkey al pastor tacos for Thanksgiving Day

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Happy Mexican Thanksgiving Day!

Is Tia Lencha here. Gwhat is Mexican Thanksgiving Day you ask? Is Thanksgiving but with all Mexican food. What?!?! My gringo frends say. Oh no! How you can do that! Is crazy! And Tia Lencha say, no really.

When I help mijo with his homeworks, I learn that Thanksgiving come from a Puritan holiday in Englands. When it was the Reformation the Protestantes wanted to throw away all the Catholic holidays, even Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny!

Gwell, I no happy with that. (I think the Indios here in this country oso no happy with the Puritans who bring disease and then take their land–I just saying.) Anyways, Thanksgiving oso is part of a festival of the harvest and for to celebrate special blessings. So to celebrate when the al pastor taco was invent and oso that the Mexican peoples were the first ones to make the turkey domesticate, I make the turkey al pastor taco.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Turkey al pastor tacos for Thanksgiving Day

Exclusive preview of Ann Romney’s Food Blog: The Electric Stove

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(PNS reporting from BOSTON) With the election totally over, Ann Romney is free to pursue her true passion: cooking dinner every night for her large family and sharing Romney recipes.

Here’s exclusive preview of the Breakfast Club section of Ann’s upcoming food blog The Electric Stove:

White Toast

This is a very old family recipe dating back generations!

Little known fact: my Great Aunt Jebadisa was a leading pioneer in the Women’s Pre-Sliced White Bread Movement. When I think about the sacrifices she made, slicing each piece individually and toasting each slice by candle fire, I nearly break down and weep.

Mas…Exclusive preview of Ann Romney’s Food Blog: The Electric Stove

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Mexican flag three-color salsa for El Grito

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Happy Day of the Mexican Independence!

Is Tia Lencha here. Today we make a salsa that is the colors of the Mexican bandera (flag for you pochos).

Tia Lencha is all dress in her green, white, and red to celebrate El Grito, but all of her pocho and gringo friends is a little confuse. They are no in the streets today, wearing the big sombreros, fake bigotes (mustaches for you pochos), and drinking like pescados (fish for you pochos.)

This is the day for the Mexicans to celebrate 200 years free from Christopher Colombus and his amigos, and Indians turning on their own people, and diseases, and dying by the millions, and survive only to be treated like caca by the colonizers.

Thas a lot to celebrate if ju ask Tia Lencha.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Mexican flag three-color salsa for El Grito

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Rajas con crema if you don’t espeak English

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Hola. Is Tia Lencha here. Today I give you the recipe for Rajas con Crema. This was inspire by a trip to the store that sells Mexican things like dancing papier mâché skeletons, Frida Kahlo key chains, overpriced things for the wall. You know, is like Mexican Disneyland. I went in looking for a rebozo to give as a present for my comadre’s birthday.

I find the skinny hipster girl behind the cash register and I say, “Do you have any rebozos?”

“What’s that?” she say.

Anyone who knows Tia Lencha knows that she wanted to give the hipster girl a coco in la cabeza. “What do you mean what’s that? Is…a shawl…like you call it in English.”

“Oh. No,” she say.

“No what?”

“We don’t have those here,” she say. And she turn around like we were finish.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Rajas con crema if you don’t espeak English

When you can’t bear life without nachos, you need nachos tattoos

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Some people can’t get through the morning with a cup of coffee, and others, apparently, can’t get through the day without delicious crunchy oozing-with-queso nachos:

We love nachos. Duh. We want to show it on our arms, legs, and face. Stains are not permanent enough, while permanent tattoos are against our religions.

So they made temporary nachos “tattoo” decals.

Would you get them? Wear them?

Thanks to BoingBoing for the link!

Letter to the Editor: Thank you, organic cocks/hens as appropriate

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This Letter to the Editor came in via our SUBMIT link. We’d like to hear from you, too!

Dear organic chicken or chickens (or cocks and/or hens) who were the source of the two thighs I ate last night:

Thank you for your lives.

I guess it is presumptuous to write to you since we never met when you were alive and now you’re dead and I ate you. Actually, I don’t know really know WHO to thank since it’s unclear if these were a matched set of thighs (left and right) from a single chicken or whether they were two thighs from two chickens and now that I think about it I didn’t even check to see if they were left or right and how would I know?

Mas…Letter to the Editor: Thank you, organic cocks/hens as appropriate

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Make all your beans come true

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Hi. Is Tia Lencha here. Sorry I haven been on the blogue. I don’t like to complains, but I have a son, and varicose veins. But I have to tell you about when I was making a pot of beans and I remember the time when I help my hijo make his dream come true.

It was summer and I was still with mijo’s father. Mijo and I stayed at home during the vacations from school. Mijo say he was bore being at the house, so I say, “why don’t we make a project?”

Mijo, who was six year old, say, “Can we make something?”

Oh! So cute! I say, “Yes, mijo, what do you want to make?”

He thought for a little bit and say, “I want to make the perfect pedo.”

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Make all your beans come true

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