safety

Pocho Ocho sketchy substances in Mexican hot sauce besides lead

by

elpatoskullNBC reports that El Pato Salsa Picante has been withdrawn from the American market because tests found it was contaminated with lead. El Pato is just one of several Mexican salsa brands that contain the poisonous substance, according to scientists at the University of Nevada Las Vegas.

Of course, there’s no way lead is the only nasty in these little bottles. And sure enough — buried in footnotes at the bottom of the report — are the Pocho Ocho OTHER sketchy substances in Mexican hot sauce:

8. The average Cholula bottle contains 10 micrograms per deciliter of the “Bacillus Botas Picudas”, an organic pathogen thought to be behind the craving for pointy  boots.

7. Habaneros chiles may be the top ingredient in El Yucateco Salsa Picante de Chile Habanero, but lurking at the bottom of the list are 8.8 micrograms per deciliter of “Barba Habanera,” said to be a homeopathic solution of hair scraped from Comrade Fidel’s razor.

Mas…Pocho Ocho sketchy substances in Mexican hot sauce besides lead

Pocho Ocho must-have Mayan Apocalypse survival kit items

by

With Mayan Apocalypse Doomsday 2012 under three months away, time is running out to assemble the emergency survival supplies you’ll need in your underground shelter. [Check our countdown clock in the right column.]

Remember:

Unforeseen dangers and unknown entities will be lurking in your No-Tech Future Hell on Earth (think Mad Max meets the chupacabra), what you have with you will determine whether you live or die.

Aside from rice, beans, water, sanitary supplies and beer (which will also be the means of exchange, i.e., money), these are the pocho ocho top items you need:

-------------- ✂ CLIP & SAVE ✂ --------------

8. Aqua Net
7. VapoRub
6. Switchblade (for him)
5. Chanclas (for her)

Mas…Pocho Ocho must-have Mayan Apocalypse survival kit items