security
You can’t be too careful these days
Here’s what we saw when we opened the cyberwindow tonight at the POCHO Ñewsroom in downtown Rancho Pocho, CA.
Forget ‘porn names’ — get your Official Hacker Name here!
Your Official Hacker Name is easy to generate.
- Use the color of your shirt for the first half in your Official Hacker Name.
- Your email password is your last half of your Official Hacker Name.
Post your Offical Hacker Name below!
Breaking: Malaysian jet mystery prompts terrorist alert
(PNS reporting from the EAST LOS ANGELES) Pocholandia security officials issued a terrorist alert this morning prompted by the mysterious disappearance of Malaysia Airlines MH370 over the Gulf of Thailand or the Strait of Malacca or wherever that shit happened, yo.
“I am alerting you terrorist pendejos. Stay the hell out of East Los!“ said spokesman Gustavo “Little Lalo” Madrigal of the Minivan Crips, a volunteer neighborhood watch group.
“The AMERICAN ME ORANGE ALERT is the second highest alert classification used by the Pocholandia Security Advisory System, bitches, so watchale!” he added.
Graphics by Victor Payan via Hollywood Sign Generator and Personal Threat Level.
PREVIOUSLY ON TERRORIST THEATRE:
Update: We made it through the hack attack but still need your help
This graphic shows how hackers overwhelmed the site one day last week. Those three “load” figures at the top should be close to “1.” All the “USERS” you see on Comic Seanz’s screen cap show our webserver software (Apache) trying to keep up with bullshit requests from evil hack robots.
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Can you donate $20 or $50 so we can make more ñews y satire? |
The hackers who overwhelmed our site are gone — for now. But we still need your help so we can beef up POCHO’s infrastructure. Money help.
- Bringing in security pro to sweep our site will cost at least $100 — and could cost more if she finds something.
- Updating our hosting package — now provided as a public service by our friends at Pixelgate.net — means more dinero — over $100 more each month.
- Upgrading our WordPress theme software (the recent upgrade left a slew of bugs we’re trying to iron out), is another hundred or so plus expensive web developers.
We don’t have the money to do this stuff — without you.
Mas…Update: We made it through the hack attack but still need your help
Defense contractors on immigration bill: ‘Time to get a new Beemer’
(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON, DC) The Senate’s approval of a bipartisan “immigration reform” bill Thursday — a bill which Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) says will create “the most militarized border since the Berlin Wall” — has defense contractors talking, and drooling.
The hot topic? The untold millions of dollars that may become available if Uncle Sam gets serious about “security.”
It’s the inevitable transition, cynics say, from Eisenhower’s old-school military-industrial complex to the new Post-Millennial MIGRA-Industrial Complex. But government contractors and suppliers have a more nuanced view.
Mas…Defense contractors on immigration bill: ‘Time to get a new Beemer’
It’s a beautiful day in POCHO’s cyberhood (toon)
Here’s what we see when we open the cyberwindow at the POCHO Ñewsroom in downtown Rancho Pocho, CA.
Native American faces down anti-immigrant protest (NSFW video)
In a video uploaded Tuesday, and since widely-republished, a Native American pushing a baby in a stroller educates a crowd of Tucson, AZ anti-immigration demonstrators about who is really American and who is an alien invader. (NSFW language.)